#i have zero nostalgia left but...man

[kari-izumi]

The most surprising thing about the Voltron news is the complete and utter lack of reaction from any of the BNFs who were around at the time, on the platform where the fandom was largely birthed from.

the only post I found with more than 100 notes was understandably more concerned about She-Ra 's fate after May 2026.

I don't even got nothing to say really except that it truly makes you think

[simpforrooster]

falling for a girl in purple & gold.

Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin x F!Reader

summary: your brother convinces you to join him at his tailgate. you meet a gorgeous blonde, who happens to root for the opposing football team.

t/w: lots of mention of alcohol. she/her pronouns. cursing. instalovey.

a/n: i’ve been dying to write something like this. this fic is def based off megan maroney’s ‘tennessee orange’ and conner smith’s ‘orange & white.’ i left readers school pretty ambiguous until the verrrrrry end. i’m an lsu girlie 💜💛 so i needed a little self-service.

Stepping into the tailgate tent, nostalgia fills your body. You are transported immediately back to your time in college. Cheering on your alma mater with your sorority sisters. Hooking up with those random frat guys who definitely showed you a good time. You’d have to remember to thank your brother for making you come.

“Sis!” Speak of the devil. Your brother envelops you into a huge bear hug, as if he didn’t see you one week prior at your family’s standing dinner date. You return his hug.

“I am so glad you made it!”

Your brother began introducing you to several of his friends who were taking up space in the tailgate tent. If he doesn’t know them from his fraternity days, then he knows them from the Navy.

“Two more guys are planning to show,” your brother says. “Guys from my time in Miramar.” You understand this to mean from his time at TOPGUN.

Lucky for you, you’ve been schooled in all things naval aviation thanks to the burly guy you call a brother. There was no way he was going to have a sister have zero knowledge about the Navy.

His words, not yours.

Leaving you to ponder, your brother begins mixing drinks. He hands you his “special” after a few minutes. His special being vodka, with a tiny splash of sprite and cranberry juice.

You take the drink from him, raising your brows.

“It’s the first tailgate of the year, sis. Go big or go home.”

You’d much rather go home than consume a ton of alcohol in this heat.

“Well if it ain’t Bozo!” you hear a deep voice call, with a sliiiiight country accent.

“Hey guys!” your brother calls with the enthusiasm of a kid who just unwrapped a PS5 from under the tree. “I’m glad y’all made it.”

You turn and take in the source of that accent, and almost spill your drink. Your brother never told you he was friends with Adonis.

His blonde hair fans out at his neck, beneath a nice Stetson, like he’s skipped a few haircuts. A pair of jeans hug his hips, and across his chest, the school colors of the enemy.

University of Texas. You were sure that burnt orange wouldn’t look good on anyone, but this man is proving that notion wrong. Your eyes lock with his, and he makes sure you see his eyes trail down your body.

When those green eyes meet yours, he drops his right eye in a slow wink.

“Bozo, I didn’t know you colluded with the enemy,” you say to your brother, nodding toward the handsome blonde.

“Ah, well,” Bozo starts, rubbing his hand behind his neck, “not everyone is perfect.”

“What do they call you?” you ask the blonde, not being able to take not knowing his name any longer.

“Hangman.” He fixes you with a gorgeous smirk, and tips that cowboy hat.

“Hangman?” you question, cocking an eye brow.

Those eyes peer into yours. “Yes ma’am.” The way he says those two words has you thinking of all the instances he could say them in.

“What do they call you when you’re not flying a plane?”

“Jake. And your name, pretty lady?”

“Y/n.” You stick a hand out toward him. Jake reaches forward, taking your hand lightly into yours. The two of you stand there, shaking hands for what feels like an eternity. Neither one of you wanting to break the contact.

“Fuck, Bozo. You never mentioned how beautiful your sister is,” Jake says to your brother, but never taking his eyes off you.

“Because you’re a fucking playboy, Bagman,” he says.

“Funny,” Jake comments.

And you’d gladly let him.

“A playboy, huh?” You quip.

Jake shrugs a shoulder. “Maybe I just haven’t met the right lady yet.”

The way he peers into your eyes has you sipping your mixed drink in order to hold some of your sanity. This man has the potential to ruin you.

And you’d gladly welcome it.

Grabbing his hand, you pull him toward the beer pong table. “Be my partner.” You fix him with one of your award winning smiles.

“Anything for you, darlin’,” he drawls. Gah, that accent is gonna be the death of you. The two of you fall into a steady rhythm, beating your brother and another aviator, Rooster, effortlessly.

Jake holds up his hand for a high five. When your hand meets his, his fingers lace between yours. He pulls you into him. You can’t be sure if the vodka is making you lightheaded, or the way your body feels pressed against his.

“I’m having the time of my life with you, sweet thing,” he says into your ear. You giggle into his chest. You actually giggle. You’ve never giggled in your life.

“What would you say if I needed to kiss you?” Jake asks against your temple. Spying your brother working the makeshift bar, you grab Jake’s hand. You lead Jake down an alley situated between two class buildings.

“I’d say, kiss me, Hangman,” you say, grabbing his ugly, orange jersey to pull him toward you. One of his hands braces his weight against the wall, just outside your shoulder. He has you completely caged in, that strong body hovering over yours. Jake reaches up to pull his hat from his head. He casually holds the hat up, blocking anyone from seeing the two of you.

Between Jake’s kisses and your brother’s mixed drink, you’re feeling all kinds of good. Not wanting any of it to stop, you grip his jersey tighter, pulling him as close as you can get him.

A low groan escapes his mouth, and the fact that he’s seemingly affected by you the same way you are by him has you reeling.

“A gentleman would at least take you out first before kissing you like this,” he murmurs.

“Oh yeah?” you question, not really letting his words soak in.

“Mhmm. Too bad I am not feeling too gentlemanly, right now.” Jake deepens the kiss, and your hands leave his jersey and thread through his hair.

“Good,” you breathe.

Your watch buzzes, pulling you from Jake’s tantalizing kisses. Taking a peek, your brother’s name appears across it.

Where the fuck are you? We have to go into the stadium.

Jake pulls his phone from his back pocket. “Bozo,” he murmurs.

“Where are your seats?” You ask, still breathless from his kissing.

“Next to you,” he says, placing once more kiss to your lips. Pulling you from the wall, he plops his hat onto your head.

“Fuck, my dads going to be so pissed I’m falling for a girl in purple & gold,” Jake says shaking his head. “Lead the way, darlin’.”

masterlist.

[wutheringcaterpillar]

Remember That Night? Chapter 1/4

Summary: What happens when your boss whom your head over heels for calls you in the middle of the night to go for a drive and things go further than they should? Will they make it work or will it end in tragic heartache?

warnings: boss/employee relationship, nostalgia, deep descriptions of heartbreak

italicized is past tense.

The case files spread out across your desk were all mixing together in a blur. It felt like there was no end to it and this was the one you thought was gonna stick with you. The rest of the team had left except for Aaron. He was sitting in his own office looking for anything that could stand out exactly like you were.

Glancing up you saw his eyes scanning the papers intently with one hand resting on his forehead. In your heart you missed the bond that you shared with him deeply but the chances of anything happening again were close to zero and it made your heart ache to think that he’d never be yours.

A few months after Haley passed Aaron was having a night just like the one you’re having now and he needed closure. The night still replayed in your mind at moments like this but you’re okay now. It had been five months since the two of you cut whatever connection you had romantically off. You’ve moved on and entered the dating world, it was for the better. Closing the case files you began to put them back in order and erase the case from your mind for the night. Right when you were about ready to get up and head out Aaron approached you at your desk and sat down in a chair across from you. “It’s late. Every one else went home hours ago. Everything okay?” His intent gaze stared deep into your eyes but you didn’t allow yourself to get lost in him. “Yeah, I just don’t understand how some people can be so cruel. I think this is the one that’s gonna stick with me and it worries me but, I know I need to get home and get rest.”

“Y/N, you know I’m always here if you need to talk or vent.” You nodded in response. The two of you sat in silence for a moment, you couldn’t help but see him twiddle his thumbs a bit, it looked as if he was in deep thought, his eyebrows were knitted together like they always were when he was like this. “What about you? Are you okay? Everything going well with Beth?” He stopped all movement and his eyes connected with yours once more. “Can I ask you something?”

“I’m an open book ask away.” He shifted in his chair, leaning forward a bit. “Do you remember that night? The first night?” All of a sudden the memory came flooding back like hurricane.

The night was beautiful out, a clear sky, twinkling stars, streetlights lit up the roads just outside of your apartment. The vacation you were currently on from work was much needed, thoughts of Aaron filled your mind at times. You couldn’t imagine how he was coping, being a single father, going to sleep in a bed without his wife. It had to have been difficult, you knew the crush you had on him was silly and that it would never go anywhere but you couldn’t help the feelings you had for this man. 

Settling down onto your couch you turned on the television to catch up on one of your favorite shows, avoiding the news at all costs you wanted all crime to be out of your head for your entire week off. Cracking open a beer you grabbed a blanket and settled it over your legs. About halfway into the episode your phone rang causing a groan to escape your lips but your heart fluttered when you saw it was Aaron. What could he possibly need it was 2:30 am. “Hello?” 

“Hi. I’m sorry to be calling you this late I hope I didn’t wake you.” When he spoke he sounded like he hadn’t slept yet and that he may have been having a bad night. “No, you’re okay. Is everything alright?” 

“Y/N I just really need someone right now. I hate to bother you on your vacation but would you like to go for a drive? If you’re too tired I understand.” You couldn’t help but respond as quickly as you did, this is the moment you had been waiting for. “I’m all for it. What’d you have in mind?” You couldn’t see it but Aaron was smiling on the other end of the phone. “I know a place.” 

For the fifteen minutes it took him to get there you didn’t want to get too dressed up, it was the middle of the night after all. You left your sweats on but changed into a snug fitted shirt before brushing your hair and throwing on a pair of tennis shoes. Water was splattered on the bathroom sink from you washing your face and brushing your teeth to disintegrate the alcohol smell on your tongue. When you heard the knock on your door your heart skipped a beat. Glancing at yourself one last time in the mirror a big bright excited smile took over your flushed face. Your mind guessing where he would take you as you walked to answer the door. 

On the other side Aaron stood there also dressed in sweats and a t-shirt he looked absolutely breathtaking even out of his suit. His hair was slightly disheveled and when he spoke “Hello” to you the small dimples next to his lips formed from a smile. Aside from that you were completely locked in and lost in his eyes, he was really here. “So are you ready?” You nodded in response and he moved out of your way to excuse you into the hallway. “So where are we going?” 

“It’s a surprise.” 

Once outside he opened your car door for you like a gentleman before getting into his own side. The way his hands curled over the steering wheel and his veins popped out sent so many thoughts swirling in your mind. The car ride was filled with endless conversation, mostly him asking about your vacation and you asking how the team has been doing but neither of you talked about any cases past or present. It was nice. 

He maneuvered his car into a parking lot, there was a hill toward the top of it, looking like it would be overlooking something. 

Once out of the car the wind blew slightly causing leaves to flutter around, he noticed you cross your arms together. “Are you cold? I have an extra jacket in the car if you’d like it. I keep it in there for Jack because he tends to cold with how much I use the air conditioning.” A small chuckle escaped your lips. “No, it’s okay, it feels-“ Before you could finish your sentence he was opening the back car door and pulling out one of his gray zip up hoodies. “I insist.” As if you weren’t trying to hide your blushing cheeks enough they surely came out now. 

Putting on the jacket, Aaron stood by your side as you walked up the small hill. When you reached the top there was a single bench looking over a sea of water. “I know it’s not much but this is where I tend to go when I need to think.” 

“Aaron this is- this is beautiful.” 

“I’m glad you agree.” He patted the bench, motioning for you to sit with him. The both of you sat in silence for a few moments just listening to the waves hitting the shoreline and the breeze causing leaves to fall from the tree and dance in the surrounding area. Small clouds were starting to roll over in the sky. In that moment you felt Aaron’s arm slide behind you, pulling you in a bit closer to him, his hand resting on your upper arm. As close as you were, you wanted to be closer, wanted to be snuggling with him but you didn’t put any pressure on it and just took the moment in to yourself, thankful that this was happening. “So is Jack with Jess tonight?” Aaron nodded in response. 

“He is. Had the house to myself was feeling lonely and even though it’s been a month since Haley has passed it still manages to bother me at times like tonight. I’m really glad you came with me.” He looked over his shoulder at you taking in your beauty and you did the same taking in how handsome he was. “Me too.” The two of you gazed into each others eyes searching for someone to make a move, you both leaned in simultaneously and your lips smashed together in an electrifying kiss. His lips were extremely soft, tasting of mint and had taken your breath away. Neither of your eyes had opened during the kiss. His free hand rested gently against your cheek deepening the kiss. At that moment little sprinkles landed on the top of your head but neither of you had a care in the world. When the kiss finally broke a part of the strong feelings you had for him came out. “Would you maybe want to stay with me tonight at my place?” His eyes glistened in the rain. “I’d love nothing more.” 

The night consisted of gentle spontaneous love making and you fell asleep in the arms of the man you had loved for so long more than anything, it was perfect.

He knew he had hit a nerve with your blank expression, but some part of him was just curious if you ever thought about it? “I um- I do but I try not to. No offense. It’s just I finally have moved past us and the future is looking great for me but Aaron you know I still-“

“I know, you don’t have to say it.” He spoke so gently and his face was of pure care and solidity. “I still do too.” His hand rested on yours for a few seconds as you both just sat in each others company. There was something about him that still had a hold of you, a place in your heart and just when you think you could replace it you have a moment like this with him. Every thing in you wanted to quit on the spot just so you could have him but you knew in your head that things don’t work out like that. He got up from his chair and offered to follow you home to ensure you make it there safely but you politely declined. That was when your phone rang. “Hi- Yeah I’m headed home I’ll be there in a bit- I miss you too- Okay- Bye.” Aaron wanted to ask who it was but he had no right to and he knew that so he let it be. “I will see you in the morning then?” You nodded before bidding each other goodbye once again. It shouldn’t but it felt like the first time, like you lost him again.

Arriving home you threw your keys onto the table and kissed your boyfriend whom was staying for the night he noticed the pained look on your face, the sadness that filled it. “Every thing okay babe? What’s wrong?” He took you into his arms as you cried, letting every thing out. You couldn’t love someone else the way you loved Aaron, this unexplainable connection you shared with him killed you after moments the two of you shared like tonight. If he had never brought up that night you would have been fine, but he did and here you were crying over Aaron Hotchner once again, just as you were getting back to life without him in it. You ended up telling your boyfriend it was the case you were on which wasn’t fair by any means, but as he drifted into sleep next to you, you couldn’t help but look at him and get upset. He wasn’t Aaron. No one was. That was when the night he broke it off entered into your mind.

“Y/N I’m your boss and we’re getting too close. I think it’s better that this is the last night we share together in this way. We need to stop.” It felt like a tidal of waves crashed into your heart and completely shattered it. All happiness in your face disappeared. This was the last thing you expected to happen tonight. 

You sulked in your seat, tracing your thumb around the salted rim of your glass. His eyes searched your facial expression, being a profiler you knew he was reading you like a book. His hand moved a strand of hair from your face, placing it behind your ear. “Please don’t be upset. We’ll still be close, and see each other at work but I think that’s where it should stay.” A scoff escaped your lips, shaking your head you grabbed your glass and finished off the remaining alcohol before aggressively setting it back down. 

“Yeah, well not as close as I’d like.” 

“ Y/N-“ 

“Just don’t.” When you stood up out of your chair you fell back a bit and the grip of Aaron’s hand was on your arm gently right away. “At least let me drive you home you can’t drive like this.” Putting your hand up you dismissed him completely. “I’m fine. I’ll see you in the morning, boss.” Walking out of the restaurant the rain poured as if it knew how you were feeling. As soon as you were out the door away from him the tears flooded out as you walked to your car. How could he do this to you? All the dates, the phone calls, the photos, they were completely meaningless. You read him all wrong, this situation all wrong. You were head over heels in love with Aaron and you thought he felt the same. Reaching into your purse you retrieved the first keychain he had bought you, and threw it into a bush by the entrance. You wanted anything and everything that reminded you of him gone. The car ride home felt like it was never ending. The rain made it difficult to see and the only songs on the radio were depressing love songs about heartache. Walking into your apartment you tossed your keys onto the table before turning on the lights and setting the alarm. 

Making your way into your bedroom you glanced around the room, you thought to yourself how your never going to be graced with Aaron’s face or presence in it ever again. Falling into your bed you clutched your pillow tightly tears flowing out like an ocean while his side of the bed lay empty. A hole in your heart is all that you felt, you couldn’t even imagine having to see him at work tomorrow. You could just see yourself excusing yourself to go cry somewhere. You really thought he could be the one but all hope of that had vanished. The next morning your tear stained face made you look a mess your clothes were disheveled, hair a mess but you couldn’t find a care in the world. You wanted to walk into work and make him see what he did to you. The buzzing of your phone dragged you out of your thoughts. A voicemail notification from Aaron popped up. As much as your head told you not to listen to it your heart spoke differently. “Hi, I wanted to make sure you got home safely and that you’re doing okay. If you could let me know that’d be great but if not I’ll see you at work. I truly hope there’s no hard feelings Y/N. Well I guess that’s all goodbye.” How dare he, no hard feelings? Does he not realize how much he broke you? You wanted to throw your phone and cry again but you decided to keep yourself composed and get ready for work and head in. Of course Aaron ended up calling in because Jack got sick, and he did text you about it but you reluctantly responded with, “I don’t think we should text or call anymore about anything personal. Strictly work.” He hadn’t responded for hours and the day completely dragged out you couldn’t focus and the team took notice especially Emily and Spencer because they were the closest to you but you didn’t tell them anything about your situation just that you were having a bad day. They were understanding and said they would be there whenever you’re ready to talk about it. When you went home for the night digging for clean clothes you found one of Aaron’s work shirts in your hamper, it must have been the only one not washed because it still smelled exactly like him. As much as your head told you not to put it on your heart spoke differently. As soon as you slipped it on the tears began again and you just spent the night in your apartment alone, sulking, listening to sad music, watching sad movies, cooking dinner for one, yourself. Things were different and you hated it, your body hated it, and you barely knew how to function mentally, physically, and emotionally. Was there ever going to be an end to this pain?

Little did you know Aaron did follow you home to make sure you got there safely, you didn’t put any thought into the car following you because all your thoughts were about Aaron. He watched and made sure you got in the door but to his surprise a man opened the door and he was ready to get out of his car to come protect you until he stopped with his door halfway opened as he saw you kiss the man. You had moved on, but you were unaware of the fact that Aaron had gotten the papers for his two weeks and had broken up with Beth a week ago. That’s why he never answered how she was earlier because he hadn’t been talking to her. He couldn’t be upset but he was and it was completely selfish. So against his will he drove home, to an empty apartment like before and went to sleep in an empty bed, holding onto the memory of you being next to him as he cried and held onto a shirt you left at his apartment that he couldn’t bring himself to get rid of.

[loganwritesprobably]

I Can't Do This Anymore

Inspired by some chatting about Shanks I was doing with @fanaticsnail and @maritimebird

Content/Warnings: Shanks/GN!Reader, breaking up, arguing, hurt/no comfort, Shanks is characterised as a bad guy/ kind of toxic

Four years. Four entire years of your life dedicated to Red Haired Shanks. He was globally revered and respected, considered one of the strongest of a generation, a real contender for Pirate King as an apprentice and honorary son of Gol D. Roger. He was also a scumbag. It seemed like you were the only person who knew that, though, and frankly you were ashamed it'd taken you this long.

You'd woken up today feeling stronger than you had in ages, and when you sat for breakfast alone once again, you knew it was over. You were already gone, you'd emotionally left your partnership months ago, you'd just been hanging on for the sake of nostalgia, because of the man he'd been at first, who you'd wanted him to be. Who he hadn't been in a long time. Plus, you were finally coming up on an island and the Red Force would be docking, so you'd be able to completely leave Shanks, the ship and the crew. A clean break.

He wouldn't wake up for hours, you knew that now. No matter how many times you'd told him it would be nice to spend the morning together, to be quietly present for each other when you first woke up, he never stirred til after noon. It was because of his drinking of course, and you knew that, but he wouldn't cut back on that either. Why would he do that?

You left the kitchen before Lucky had even finished preparing breakfast with just a slice of toast in hand. You didn't feel like food this morning.

You sat on the deck with Beckman while he smoked, and you explained to him what you were about to do. He accepted it, had even seen it coming, and agreed to help you leave without Shanks clinging on or lingering on the island to try to make you come back.

When Shanks finally emerged after lunch had already been served, you headed to take a shower while Yassop and Hongo helped to pack up your stuff from Shanks' room, wanting to cause as little suspicion as possible.

Freshly washed, in the perfect outfit for the occasion which made you feel confident, you returned to the deck. Shanks sat with Beck, one smoking and the other drinking, idle chatter occasionally passing between them.

"Shanks, I need to talk to you." You said, interrupting whatever they'd been speaking about. "Sorry doll, I was just chatting with Beck, can you give me ten mi-" "No. I can't. This is more important." You said, voice firm, expression stony. "Oh c'mon just a few-" "No Shanks. Not this time. We can have this conversation here and now if you really want, I don't care, but it might be better for your ego to go somewhere more private." You said, and Benn awkwardly scratched the back of his neck, clearly wishing he was anywhere but there. "Go on then, gorgeous, what's up?" He asked, taking zero regard for your serious tone or the look on your face. Of course he didn't, nothing ruffled the feathers of Red Haired Shanks.

"You are, you overgrown child," you hissed, surprised as the words came out of your mouth, you'd been intending on separating peacefully but clearly that wasn't going to be happening, "I am sick of you, and your bullshit Shanks! This? Us? It's over, I'm done. I'm getting off at the next island, and I'm not coming back." Shanks paused, looking temporarily confused, before a smile came back over his face and it made your blood boil. "Oh c'mon, is this cause I missed breakfast? You know I try, I just don't do mornings. I'll try again tomorrow." You'd never wanted to strike someone more. "I don't know why I bothered even trying to have a conversation - I can't even have a damn argument with you! I'm fucking leaving, you cannot grin and laugh your way through or away from that. I'm leaving this ship, this crew - I'm leaving you." You couldn't stop your anger from pouring out in your words, your hands slightly trembling from the rage coursing through you. "That feels like a bit of a rush decision, love, are you sure you've really thought about that?" Shanks replied, now looking concerned for you, as if you were experiencing some sort of meltdown.

"Oh- I've never been so fucking angry. Rush? I've been planning on leaving you for months! I'm so tired of the way you treat me, Shanks. You treat me like I - and frankly like nothing else - matters! You can't just laugh and shrug all your problems away, and ignore my attempts to communicate and tell you when there's a problem in our relationship. I have dedicated four years of my life to you, and most of those years were spent being delusional and convincing myself that it wasn't that bad, and I just had to remember how could things could be. But they never went back to being that good. I'm not even sure they were that good to begin with, you just charmed me with your words." It was a lot to scream at someone in public, knowing the crew had all stopped what they were doing to listen to you, to witness what would happen when you raised your voice at the Captain like that. "There's no need to yell doll, c'mon. This should be private." You couldn't believe him. A wave of unstable, humourless laughter overcame you that you couldn't help releasing, and Benn eyed you warily. "Oh you are so lucky you're stronger than me, because if I thought I had any sort of chance, I'd attack you." You told him, still laughing just a little. It was a cruel sort of power imbalance between you really. "Is that a threat?" Shanks asked, and you pinched the bridge of your nose, the humour passing and being replaced by just.. exhaustion.

"Benn, my stuff is all packed, I'm going to go sit with it until we dock and then I'm gone." You said to the first mate before turning on your heel to walk away. "Where are you going? Are you seriously just walking away from me like that?" Shanks yelled after you, standing from his chair. "Yes! That's exactly what I just told you I was doing!" You replied, but you didn't turn to look back at him, just continued on your way.

When you docked, Shanks appeared to have disappeared. You hauled your stuff from the ship, and hugged the crew goodbye. It wasn't fair that you'd lose your friends just because you'd split with Shanks, but that was just the way of things. They were his men, not yours. You sat on top of a crate, rubbing hands over your face as you shoved down the rising tide of emotion in your chest.

"Hey," Benn said, stepping up to stand beside you, "if you ever need anything.. I mean it anything, just call." He said, handing you two pieces of paper. One piece held the number for his den den, while the other was blank - his vivre card. "Thank you." You said emphatically, and then he walked away, back to the crew.

You sat there, just observing, as the crew ran to quickly board their ship with their small restock, and undocked from the port, Shanks stood on the deck observing you.

The red force sailed away, and you heaved a deep sigh of relief. You finally felt like you could breathe again.

Tags: @claryeverlarkf @uselessboots @cainnoable

[dweetwise]

[Riconti] Holiday spirit

Happy holidays riconti fandom! Please accept this gift of festive fluff 🥰 Rated G | 3.2k words | ao3 link

Felix still feels strange being back in his hometown. 

The Coburg market square is bustling with life at the annual Christmas market. Felix was never an avid visitor before, but this time the nostalgia is kicking in full force: the smell of street food and mulled wine, the glow of string lights and the big Christmas tree, and even the obnoxious holiday jingles make his chest ache with familiarity. It’s almost like he never left Coburg in the first place.

Except for the fact that one Ace Visconti is here with him.

Ace has a mug of Glühwein in his hands and is blowing on the hot beverage, his eyes eagerly drinking in the busy market. It’s a couple degrees below zero and a gentle snow is falling, but despite Felix’s best efforts to the contrary Ace is thoroughly underdressed for the weather. He has neither gloves nor anything to cover his head, and his windbreaker jacket and pants might protect him from the nonexistent wind but not the late-December temperature.

But even if Ace must be freezing, he hasn’t complained once.

…Unlike Felix, who complained first about the long line to the sausage kiosk, then about the awful apple punch they made the mistake of trying, and then about a family of stupid tourists blocking the street. But that’s neither here nor there.

Ace’s nose and ears are already red and Felix should probably be annoyed at him for not dressing properly, but instead he finds it oddly endearing. He doesn’t know how long it will take Ace to get used to German winters after decades of sun on the west coast of the USA, but today is clearly not that day.

A group of teenagers pass them on the street and briefly pause to stare at Ace—who’s currently browsing a selection of wooden crafts—and a few of them giggle and continue on their way. Felix really can’t blame them: the bright, clashing colors of Ace’s outfit stick out like a sore thumb in the sea of muted winterwear in grayscale and neutral colors. Looking at the neon pink and green for too long would probably give Felix a migraine; but then again, he only has his past self to blame for deciding to flirt with a man who combined a leopard print shirt with purple sequin pants.

Felix smiles to himself. If awful fashion sense was a dealbreaker for him, their relationship would probably have lasted less than twenty-four hours total.

“What’re you grinning at?” Ace asks, having caught him staring.

“You,” Felix says bluntly. “And your outfit that is horrendously unfit for this weather.”

Ace scoffs. “It’s not that cold.”

Felix simply smiles. “Come on,” he urges, “We should try the crepes next.”

Ace obediently falls into step beside him. Felix’s hand twitches in a familiar urge to touch—born out of countless times of patching up injuries, pulling each other up on their feet, and sitting by the fire leaning against Ace in quiet solidarity—but there are too many people here and too many eyes on them.

Of course, it doesn't help that Ace is wearing the equivalent of a big flashing sign saying “Look at me!”

“You know, I wasn’t too sure about this market when you first told me about it,” Ace says while they walk. “But it’s actually really cozy with the snow and lights and all. And any event that boils down to drinking wine and eating good food? I’m sold.”

“I’m glad,” Felix says. “It was never my favorite, but I wanted to show you. And even I missed it, after…”

He trails off, and something in Ace's eyes softens. 

"I love it. And I'm glad you wanted to take me here," Ace says. And then, because getting him to be earnest for more than five seconds is like pulling teeth, he grins and adds, "Even if I'm pretty sure all these 'handmade Bavarian' souvenirs came straight out of a Bangladesh sweatshop."

Felix grimaces. He always hated how the tourist crap seemed to overtake more and more of the event each year.

That being said, he still stopped to buy a terribly overpriced and absolutely hideous knit hat while Ace was busy refilling their Glühwein mugs at another stall. It will make a nice Christmas present to match his questionable excuse for a winter jacket.

“So how exactly are crepes German or festive?” Ace prods.

“Because the French can't take credit for mixing milk with flour and throwing it on a pan,” Felix huffs. “It's bad enough they got to name them. Pretentious little shits.”

Ace smirks. “I’m telling Élodie you said that.”

“Trust me, she has much worse opinions about Germans.”

“Ah, sweet neighborly rivalry,” Ace sighs. “I can't wait to meet the Lyras again so they can try—and fail—to argue that Brazil is better than Argentina.”

He looks at Felix expectantly, clearly waiting for him to agree.

“I wouldn’t know,” Felix says. “I’ve never been.”

“Maybe you should do something about that, then,” Ace says. His voice is playful and his smile casual, but he’s still looking at Felix a little too intently for it to be a joke.

“You just have to tell me when and I'll be there,” Felix says and fully means it.

“Yeah, right,” Ace snorts. “I bet Lauren would love for you to go touristing in the middle of a big project.”

“You’re vastly overestimating my importance in the company,” Felix says. “Lauren survived five years without me. I don't think a week will even make a dent in her schedule.”

Ace regards him silently: he knows that Felix took on much less responsibility upon returning to work—“Richter & Golder” was practically just “Golder” these days, and Felix was grateful Lauren even wanted him back on the team at all—but Felix suspects it’s another thing to see it in practice.

“You'd really come to Argentina?” Ace finally asks.

“Of course,” Felix says. “But only if you want me to.”

Ace beams up at him, then throws his head back and groans dramatically. “Oh, god, my sisters will eat you alive. Please don't learn any Spanish before the trip. Or Italian. You know what, just wear noise canceling headphones whenever they’re around. Actually—”

Felix watches Ace ramble with a smile. He’s leaving for Buenos Aires in just a few days to spend the holidays with his sisters and their families, having reunited with them after their escape from the Entity. For as much as Ace sang the praises of Las Vegas and America for the last few years, he doesn't seem to care much about going back to the USA compared to Argentina and Germany.

“—though, full disclosure, if you don't like Dulce de Leche I'm breaking up with you,” Ace says.

Felix chuckles. “I suspect I won’t, but I’ll be sure to lie for your benefit.”

“That’s all I ask,” Ace says with a grin.

They’re finally coming up to the crepe kiosk and Ace turns to look at the menu. It’s a little strange to imagine not being with him for Christmas, seeing as they’ve—admittedly not by choice—spent every holiday together for the last few years. Even if said holidays mostly consisted of Dwight in an elf costume distributing firecrackers and styptic agents around the campfire.

But Felix knows they both have more important places to be. Ace hasn’t spent quality time with his family in decades, and Felix's number one priority for the foreseeable future will spending every moment he possibly can with his own new family:

His five-year-old daughter, Klara.

Felix's ex-girlfriend has invited him over for Christmas eve to have dinner and open presents together. It will most likely be indescribably awkward—especially with both his ex’s parents and her new husband there—but they’re all doing it for Klara, who seemed very excited about the idea.

Or possibly just about the extra presents.

Regardless, Felix immensely respects his ex for not only managing to build a stable home for their daughter when he disappeared, but for being honest with said daughter from the start. Even when she was furious with Felix for seemingly abandoning them, for five years she told Klara stories about her other father building houses and showed her pictures of him. And when Felix finally showed back up and tried to pick up the pieces of his broken life, he got to meet his daughter for the first time and she immediately recognized him.

Felix clears his throat before washing down the sudden lump in his throat with some Glühwein. He’s not sure what he's done to deserve so many incredible people in his life—the survivors, Lauren, his ex, Klara, Ace—but he’s determined to be a man they can all be proud of.

“Che.” Ace nudges Felix's side, pulling him out of his thoughts.

“Hm?”

“Is the crepe guy okay?” Ace whispers, leaning closer to Felix while staring at the shopkeeper frying a batch of crepes. “He just chucked three whole chocolate bars on a crepe and wrapped it up like it was normal.”

Felix snorts, his somber mood instantly elevated. “It's a Kinder bar too. That has to be some kind of crime against gastronomy.”

“I know.” Ace only pauses for a beat before asking, “Should we get one of those?”

Felix doesn’t even hesitate. “Of course.”

Ace shoots him a lopsided smirk. “You really do have a soft spot for tacky things,” he says, then turns to place their order.

Felix bites his lip to suppress a thoroughly dorky smile. Just five years ago, he would have scoffed at the mere sight of children’s street food and retro windbreakers, all to preserve the image of a man nobody even liked. And even if the motto of “be yourself” first seemed like an impossible task after half a lifetime of hiding everything genuine about himself, it’s been slowly but surely resurfacing—through trials, friendships, and having someone by his side who never judges.

Felix doesn't have to filter himself with Ace. Even his worst foot-in-mouth moments only earn teasing remarks in response and more often than not end in both of them laughing. Ace doesn’t take offense to Felix's bluntness and he more than pulls his weight in the playful bickering that has become one of Felix's favorite pastimes.

And Felix knows the feeling goes both ways: all their years together have chipped away at Ace’s compulsive lying just like it has for Felix's play-act. Ace has never had to avoid talking about his past of crimes and addiction and betraying people for money, because Felix doesn't judge him by who he was before, but rather by who he is today.

Just a few days ago, a seemingly harmless question about whether Felix could chip in for Ace’s plane tickets derailed into a serious conversation, with Ace sitting Felix down and making him swear to never give him a significant sum of money or gift him anything valuable that could be returned. There was always a part of Ace that would crave the thrill of gambling and the risk of relapsing increased significantly if he had easy money lying around—no matter if he knew said money was meant for rent, bills, or a plane ticket.

Felix was silent for a long time after that revelation. Ace tried to joke it off and desperately switch the subject, but after Felix quietly stood and pulled him into his arms, Ace just slumped against him and exhaled a long and shaky breath. Neither of them had to use words, because the meaning was clear:

Thank you for trusting me. Thank you for understanding me. Thank you for being here.

“Biological weapon acquired!” Ace strolls up to Felix with a grin, holding a cardboard plate with a crepe and two forks sticking out of it.

Felix probably shouldn't be making heart eyes at a man in full neon carrying a glorified candy pancake, but he does. 

Ace steers them to an unoccupied table and hands Felix his fork. They proceed to eat a few bites in expectant silence.

“It’s good,” Ace says, clearly surprised. “Why is it good!?”

“It’s way too sweet,” Felix complains. He still keeps eating the crepe.

“Let’s just agree that after three mugs of wine we’re too drunk to know better,” Ace says.

“Speak for yourself, you lightweight.”

“Well excuse me for not being six-foot-two and born with German beer in my veins!”

Felix snorts and proceeds to almost choke on his bite, then bows his head to wheeze quietly instead.

“That’s it, no more Kinder for you,” Ace says, holding the plate protectively against himself. “I should have known that shit is like crack to Germans. No wonder it’s banned in the States.”

Felix wheezes harder and has to lean against the table for support, his shoulders shaking with the force of his laughter. He dimly registers someone muttering, “What the fuck is wrong with that guy?” in German, but he really can’t bring himself to care.

When Felix has somewhat collected himself and looks up, Ace is smiling smugly at him around a forkful of crepe.

“Drink?” Ace asks, pushing his mug closer to Felix’s empty one over the table.

Felix nods and accepts the item, and in quiet understanding they turn to stand side by side and look over the market while Ace polishes off the crepe and Felix finishes his drink.

He enjoys these moments of silence between them just as much as the usual back-and-forth or long conversations at the campfire. Felix knows that they still have a lot to figure out when it comes to adjusting back to a normal life, with the logistics and long distance and Felix's daughter. But instead of the existential dread that’s plagued Felix for most of his life, these days he only feels a deep calm when thinking about the future.

Things have been so much easier when there’s a constant in his life, something that’s not dependent on Felix's career or family name. And every time Felix wakes from a nightmare or starts second-guessing himself on whether all that horrible shit really happened, he just has to listen to Ace snoring next to him or touch one of the numerous lucky charms he insists on showering Felix with.

Ace is tangible proof that Felix went through hell and came out stronger for it. He’s been Felix's anchor for years and even when he’s across the world, Felix still feels just as grounded as he does with Ace right by his side.

Ace glances at Felix and catches him looking—Felix has been watching him for quite some time instead of observing the market—and he quirks an eyebrow as he tosses the empty plate in a nearby bin. 

“You’re staring again,” Ace says. “Are you gonna keep nagging about my jacket?”

In response, Felix simply leans closer, then hesitates and searches Ace's eyes. Understanding dawns on Ace’s features before his mouth splits into a bright smile, and then he’s grabbing Felix by the lapels of his jacket and pulling him down for a kiss.

Ace’s nose is cold where it bumps into Felix’s cheek but his lips are warm, stained with chocolate and mulled wine and soft against Felix’s. Felix cups Ace’s head and sinks into the gentle press of their mouths, simply enjoying the closeness.

Felix doesn't care if people are watching. He doesn’t care if someone sees him with a man or thinks they’re being inappropriate. He doesn’t care that they still have many challenges to face. For the first time ever, Felix knows exactly what he wants to do with his life and he’s going to do everything in his power to get it.

Starting with kissing the man he loves in the most crowded place in all of Coburg, apparently.

Ace is trembling when they pull apart. Felix could flatter himself by thinking his kissing prowess was enough to make him weak in the knees, but the truth is that the weather must finally be catching up to Ace.

And he still won't admit it, the stubborn idiot.

“You know,” Felix starts, brushing his thumb over the stubble on Ace’s cheek. “There’s a pub I like just down the street. Why don’t we go and warm up for a little while?”

“Oh, thank god,” Ace groans and thumps his forehead against Felix’s shoulder. “I’m fucking freezing and this supposedly famous wine really isn’t all that great.”

“You could have told me you were cold.”

Ace pulls back enough to give him a defiant stare. “And listen to your ‘For the love of god, Ace, I told you five times to bring a scarf’ all the way home? Not a chance.”

“I would never,” Felix says. Ace huffs a disbelieving snort, and Felix can’t suppress his smile as he continues, “Because I told you at least ten times and also asked you to bring gloves, and a thicker jacket, and—”

“Okay, okay!” Ace exclaims. “Christ, the word Besserwisser was probably coined just for you, wasn’t it?”

Felix chuckles and reaches into his pocket for the knit cap he bought earlier. He was planning to wrap it and gift it properly another day, but practicality usually trumps sentimentality where Felix is concerned.

“Here,” Felix says, holding out the item. “Merry Christmas.”

Ace stares at the hat while most likely silently judging both its cliché reindeer pattern and questionable orange-brown color scheme.

“It’s traditional Bangladeshi reindeer,” Felix deadpans.

“Thank you,” Ace finally says slowly, then puts on the hat. “How do I look?”

Felix tries not to laugh as he takes in the sight. The cap somehow looks even worse when it’s worn because of the pattern stretching and distorting. The price tag also still dangles loosely from the too-big pompom on top, and the muted orange and brown somehow makes the neon of Ace’s jacket pop out even more obnoxiously.

“Fucking hideous,” Felix concludes.

Ace barks out a laugh and Felix chuckles too. Despite Felix’s harsh words, they’re both leaning into each other, Ace’s arms wrapping around Felix’s waist and Felix gently tucking a few errant strands of gray hair into the cap.

“Good,” Ace says, then looks up to meet Felix’s eyes with an overly exaggerated pout. “Now hold me, I’m cold.”

Felix smiles and slings an arm over Ace’s shoulders to pull him even closer. “Come on. It's not far.”

Ace lets himself be led to a quiet pub around the street corner, insisting on paying for their drinks while apologizing for not having anything to gift Felix in return. Felix maybe gets a little sappy and confesses that just having him here is the best gift of all, and in response Ace tugs him into a corner booth and kisses him longer and deeper than is probably appropriate.

And despite the cold and crowd and fashion hiccups along the way, this year’s Christmas market will remain Felix’s favorite for a long, long time.

Or at least until next year when they no doubt visit it again.

Thanks for reading! 💞 Ace’s outfit is from his leaked winter skin, because it’s tacky and I love it. (Minus the headpiece. What the fuck is that beard.)

[goblininawig]

Red Dwarfcember: Ice Skating

Summary: Spanners takes Krissie ice skating on Mimas.

Prompt: Ice Skating

Words: 642

Rated T (no warnings)

A03 link or keep reading below.

“Well?” Spanners asks, unable to keep the anxiety out of his voice. “What do you think?”

Ace leans casually against the counter of the little ring shop, looking cool as ever. In one hand he’s got a small box from which glints the diamond Spanners is hoping to put on Krissie’s finger. But first, he wants Ace’s opinion. After all, the man’s the most romantic, charismatic fellow in the entire Space Corps. He knows more than a thing or two about the way to a woman’s heart.

“Spanners, old geranium,” Ace drawls, snapping the box shut and tossing it towards Lister. “It’s just the ticket. She won’t say no to a rock like that from a man like you.”

Spanners, who caught the ring box, but just barely, holds it tightly between his palms as he receives a hearty slap on the arm from Ace.

“You reckon?”

“I’d say it was a sure bet, if I didn’t want to cheapen the romance,” Ace winks.

Spanners’ cheeks plump up cheerily as he grins. “Well then, I’d better have it rung up.”

Mimas is known, not for the Space Corps Test Base where Ace and Spanners work, but for the holiday opportunities it offers to spaceship crews and civilians alike. As such, it has a great many attractions designed to separate the visitors from their dollarpounds. Some, like the Zero Gee Orgy Center, are unique to the terraformed moon. Others, like the reproduction of Rockefeller Center Plaza with its iconic skating rink, are designed to cash in on Earth nostalgia. In the real New York, the Plaza is long gone, but on Mimas, it looks just like it does in all the old films.

Spanners, being a sucker for both old films and romantic gestures, is going to take Kristine Kochanski, his long-time girlfriend and the most incredible woman he’s ever met, to skate beneath the reproduction Christmas tree tonight, and propose to her there. Lister has never been skating himself, but Krissie loves it, and he’s sure it’ll be fine. He's a brilliant engineer. How hard can it be?

Lister lands hard on the ice, again. Before he scrabbles around on the slick surface to try to stand back up, he takes a moment to curse whoever came up with the idea of strapping knife blades to shoes in the first place. Krissie slides to a stop just beside him. Her pinball smile shines brightly as she reaches her hands for his, and Spanners feels his resentment melt away.

“Why did you insist on coming here if you can’t skate?” Krissie laughs as she hauls him back up onto his blades. 

“I wanted to do something special for you,” Spanners answers, pulling her closer, and not just because it’s easier to balance that way.

Krissie wraps her arms around his waist and presses a soft kiss to his lips. “I thought we were past this, Dave. You don’t have to do anything grand to impress me. I love you just the way you are.”

Spanners returns the kiss, but then slides carefully backwards from her embrace. “And I love you. That’s why,” he clumsily slides down on one knee, “I wanted to ask you this someplace special.”

Krissie’s gloved hands cover her mouth as Lister pulls the ring box from the pocket of his coat.

“Krissie, will you marry me?”

He opens the box, revealing the emerald-cut diamond on its white gold band. Kristine’s eyes tear up. She pulls the glove off her left hand, holding it out towards Lister.

“Oh, David, of course I will!”

She waits long enough for him to slide the ring onto her finger. Then she hauls him back up to his feet again. The kiss he receives this time is laden not just with affection, but with the promise of an entire future to be lived together.

[fallen-savior-mmz]

Fallen Savior Chapter 2;

Burning Bridges-

X huffed, his body aching as he twisted and stretched. His armor pulled and pinched at his sore muscles, never fitting quite like it was supposed to. He wished that his synthetic muscles and bones wouldn’t hurt like they did, but he supposed it was another sacrifice he had to make. 

The needs of the many outweighed the needs of the few, and he was only one tired, old reploid.

The concept of age never really had bothered X before. He knew he was old, he had been old since the day he awoke. He had never felt old, and he certainly never looked it. Even now, nearing 300 years of age, X still retained his ever youthful face, as if he had just turned 20. His systems were ever evolving, always two steps ahead of current technology.

That didn’t change the weariness he felt all the way down into his soul. It didn’t change the sheer centuries worth of emotions and physical trauma he had endured. Mega Man X was exhausted, deep down into his core. 

X was old.

His head pulsed in pain when he heard a knock at the door. He groaned lightly, stretching one last time as he got up to make another sacrifice. 

X opened the door, greeted by two young, Neo-Arcadian soldiers. Reploids from the looks of them, and still new to the world. Their eyes hadn’t seen the Elf Wars, they must have been created after.

The tired angel sighed, what would prompt such young souls into a life of danger and violence? He had seen it so many times before, far too many bright young souls lost.

He remembered a reploid not unlike himself in his younger days, his auburn hair flying wildly out the back of his helmet, his X-shaped scar across the bridge of his nose adding to the mischievous air about him.

Oh how X dearly missed his friends! That particular stab of nostalgia and grief left him as quickly as it struck him. He had work to do.

“Greetings Master X, Dr. Weil ordered us to escort you to the docks for today’s patrol.” one of the young men spoke, a slight waver to his voice. It wasn’t often one got to meet the Legendary Mega Man X in person. 

X nodded, his armor glinting in the dim light of the inner sanctum as he stepped out of his quarters and into the hallway.

“Very well, I thank you for this. Let’s be on our way.” X didn’t wait for the two young men, stepping away and down a path he hadn’t taken since the Dark Elf was sealed. Even now, he felt her tugging deep in his core as he walked further and further away from Yggdrasil.

This is a mistake. Please don’t let anything happen, please…

X pleaded in silence. Was he pleading to Zero, or perhaps Dr. Light? Maybe he was pleading to some foreign higher power. He wasn’t sure. All he knew was the feeling of dread filling his entire being had only increased tenfold since the previous night.

He was vaguely aware of the two reploids behind him, whispering excitedly to one another as they walked.

"It's amazing, he's amazing!"

"I know, I never thought we'd ever meet him, he's shorter than I expected but he's still so cool!"

X almost smiled at that, reminded of his own days as a Maverick Hunter. Long ago, he had been that starry eyed hunter, gushing about meeting someone with so much perceived power.

Power...what power, as if it could stop Omega and the Dark Elf. Power is a false god that too many spend their lives praying to….

Ah, Zero, when did I get so philosophical? Wallowing in my own sorrow…

With X’s mood now soured beyond repair, he ignored the reploids behind him as they continued their journey.

On and on, the hallways of Neo Arcadia’s inner and outer sanctums stretched, making X wonder if he had forgotten his way to the outside world.

He had helped design the city, been one of the ones there from its initial concept to its construction after Omega had been defeated. He should know these hallways, shouldn’t he? Was that how out of touch he had been with everything?

Grief and sheer exhaustion had muddied many of his memories of those days, only able to glide through each waking hour with the help of his Council, even Dr. Weil. He really should thank the man more for guiding him through that tumultuous time. Even now, the managing of his schedule kept him from slipping too deep into depression. 

He really ought to thank his council, even when they frustrated him like this.

Just when X was beginning to wonder if he’d need to ask the young men behind him for reassurance that he was in fact, heading to the loading docks, the hallway turned, and opened up into a large, cavernous room. Trucks of varying sizes were parked all around the room, tanks and other war machines from the Elf Wars lined the walls. The wall farthest from X had been opened, leading out into the desolate air and empty highways. Early morning light streamed through, causing X to wince and have to squeeze his eyes shut for a moment.

A kind of hush fell over the reploids and soldiers in the room, everyone watching their leader step forward and walk towards the open door. X felt the Dark Elf’s connection to him thrum, the pain seemingly magnifying with every step, as if she could sense how close X was to leaving Neo Arcadia.

He ignored her, his mind solely set on the clear blue sky and warm sunlight in front of him. It had been years since he had last stepped outside of the sanctum, years since he had truly felt the sun’s golden rays on his body.

Mega Man X gasped when he fully stepped outside of the city, the seal on the Dark Elf and himself straining under the force of her attempting to escape, the term “dormant” being used incredibly loosely for her containment.

X again ignored her as he sighed happily, the sunlight muting the pain he felt through their shared connection. He hadn’t realized just how much he missed being outdoors, feeling the sun on his face and warming his body. Even with the stress of the Dark Elf, he hadn’t felt so content in years…

“Master X, I’m sorry to disturb you, but the convoy must leave on time. If you’re ready…?” one of the convoy captains stepped forward, calling X back from his basking. The android reluctantly returned to the trucks, leaving that tranquility and blissful feeling at the entrance to the garage.

The convoy captain that had approached him led him to his vehicle, introducing him to the reploids that would be accompanying him on their patrol, including the two young soldiers who had escorted him here. 

X offered them a small smile, a distant echo of the commander he used to be, before turning back to the captain. It was the least he could give them for being kind to him.

“So, our route will take us around the wastelands to the edges out the Forest of Dysis, and then back through the Old Residential District before we return to Neo Arcadia. The patrol shouldn’t last for more than eight hours.” the captain finished his report of the route to X, looking up at him to ensure that the android was listening.

X nodded, mentally tracking what kind of route that would be and how close to the forest they would get. A little flicker of hope sparked in X’s chest that maybe they could scan for Zero, just to see if maybe, in some one in a million chance that he was still alive, that they could find him.

He stamped that hope out as quickly as it appeared, not letting himself believe even for a moment that his husband was still alive.

“This all looks excellent Captain…?” he glanced up at the reploid again, asking for the Captain’s name.

“Captain Tria, Master X. Dr. Weil assigned me as leading Captain today.” Tria answered, holding his hands behind his back. Pride seemed to radiate off of the reploid, being Weil’s chosen clearly doing a lot for the young man’s ego.

“Ah, thank you Captain Tria. I assume we’re in safe hands then. What kind of opposition will we be facing?” X wished they could stop discussing the mission and just leave already, his entire being wishing it could be back out in the sun, ignoring the Dark Elf’s prying connection.

“Rogue pantheons and mechaniloids, mostly reported here, around the edges of the Forest. We’ll check as thoroughly as we can there before we send any salvage teams.” Tria held a data pad out for X to take, a holographic map showing little red dots where higher activity had been reported.

X sighed, rolling his shoulders to help alleviate the stiffness in his joints and chase away the dull pain. He handed the data pad back to Tria, walking over to his assigned truck. He was pleased to find that his buster had already been placed in the truck.

X’s iconic Mega Buster had been lost long ago in the wars, his entire arm having been smashed beyond repair by Omega during one of their later conflicts, the reploid’s mad obsession with violence finally taking full hold as he had attempted to shred X apart piece by bloody piece. 

X supposed he had been lucky to make it out of that one. His arm hadn’t been so lucky.  He found, however, that he actually preferred the buster he had now to the old one, instead of it being an actual weapon attached to his body, being a hand held pistol. He liked that his weapon was no longer part of him, something he could separate himself from whenever he wanted.

It was freeing, in a grim, morbid kind of way. Something capable of so much destruction being ripped from his very being.

X ran his hand over the weapon, hesitant to use it again after so long of leaving it. His “gut” twisted as he realized it had been years since he put the weapon down, and here he was, picking it back up again.

“Master X...are we ready to proceed?” Captain Tria spoke from behind him, clearly anxious to get going.

“Yes, lead us out. And let us hope for an easy mission.” X spoke, not turning to face Tria, drowning in his memories once more. He mindlessly boarded the truck, taking the passenger seat so he could help watch for any potential threats.

The convoy set out onto the highway, X’s truck taking the middle spot. As it drove out onto the open sea, the android’s eyes were drawn to the ever turning blue expanse, watching as they crashed against the pillars holding the highway up.

Melancholy filled him as he watched the water, just as it always did when he looked at the ocean. The deep blues and greens reminded him of his younger days, days spent with Zero and his friends in between wars. Precious memories that he held close to his heart. He visited them more often than he cared to admit, allowing himself to experience what little joy was still to be had in those days.

Sure, they weren’t perfect, X knew that. He was a hunter, a unit commander, and carried the weight of the world on his shoulders.

But they were there to help me. Alia, Signas, Douglas, Axl, Palette, Layer…

Zero…

X didn’t pay attention the rest of the ride, the Neo Arcadians in the back of the truck conversing and laughing, living their own lives as X lived out his memories in silent torture. Hours passed, the ocean fell far behind them, and the great leader of Neo Arcadia existed only in his mind, even the Dark Elf’s incessant beating against his systems falling into the back of his consciousness.

Captain Tria’s voice brought him back to reality, along with the sheer strain his body felt as the connection between him and the city stretched so far. X almost gasped as he was suddenly made aware of his current existence, the pain from the seal taking his breath away for a moment. It had never felt this intense before, not even the initial sealing itself had felt this painful.

X pushed it aside as he answered the Captain’s call.

“Master X, we’re approaching the Forest of Dysis. We will be slowing the convoy down and scanning the length of the highway. Please be prepared to alert us and make contact with any mechaniloids or pantheons you may find.” Tria instructed, the convoy slowing as it approached the raggedy sea of half dead trees. X pinged back a quick confirmation before grabbing his buster and climbing out of the truck.

The driver spluttered, attempting to call him back in as the vehicle was still moving, but X ignored him, the pain making him act somewhat rashly.

He positioned himself on top of the truck, buster in one hand, and his other hand placed gently on his helmet. Dr. Light’s armors and upgrades from all those years ago paid off, as his scanner was more advanced than most around, even without the Second Armor.

Meticulously, X began scanning the surrounding area, taking time to ensure he swept every possible crevice around, the Neo Arcadians below waiting and ready for Mega Man X to call out the signal of an attack.

But none ever came.

As they continued down the length of the highway, X became increasingly confused. Nothing was coming up at all, no stray pantheons, no mechaniloids, nothing. 

Captain Tria called for the convoy to stop as they neared the end of their route. X leaped from the top of his truck, wincing as the landing shook his already aching body, the pain still heavy enough to cause him to hesitate before making his way to Tria’s truck.

The captain himself sat in his own truck, puzzling over the data pad he had shown X earlier. The android rapped his knuckles against the side of the man’s door before opening it.

“Greetings Master X, I’m just ensuring that we have the correct route here. This doesn’t make any sense…” the man muttered, his eyes still glued to the data pad in front of him.

“Maybe we got lucky this time. I scanned every inch of this highway and there's nothing out here. Is there any chance the data is wrong?” X scanned their immediate area again, unsurprised to find everything coming up as empty.

“No, no...This was the latest report we got from the last scouting mission. This is supposed to be the most updated data we have. They couldn’t have all just...vanished, right?” Tria looked up at X, clearly attempting to appeal to X’s experience and wisdom.

“You’re right they wouldn’t. So either your data is wrong, or something went wrong with the equipment. One thing is for certain though, there’s nothing here. We might as well head back.” X glanced in the direction of the city, its shining gold and white pire completely lost in the distance now.

Tria nodded, tossing the data pad to the side. “Yeah, you’re right. There’s nothing around so we might as well go home. Thank you for coming with us on this mission Master X.” the man gave a slight smile, his eyes tired and almost regretful.

What would Tria have to regret about an uneventful mission? X decided not to think about it, as the only answer was that he WANTED the violence.

“Of course, I’m only grateful for a quiet expedition. I hope we have the same peace on the way home.” X responded, patting Tria’s door twice before slamming it shut and returning to his truck.

In a few moments, the convoy started again, the scanners still active but not being as closely monitored. X turned his off, instead focusing on blocking out the pain from the Dark Elf and relishing his remaining time outside.

As dangerous as the escapade out of Neo Arcadia had been, it felt so relaxing to be out and in the open air again. Much of the planet had been destroyed and polluted by centuries of war, so “fresh air” was a stretch, but the sentiment was there.

The convoy set off for the Old Residential District, still scanning the area as it went. Many of the Neo Arcadians in the back of the truck took to napping or sitting silently as they made the journey home. X found himself slumped against the window, his eyes threatening to close. He couldn’t remember the last time he had had a proper nap. 

Probably not since before the Elf Wars. Maybe his last nap had been wrapped in Zero’s arms, safe and sound before the world descended into chaos.

X imagined Zero was here now, holding him and telling him to rest, he had earned it…

“INCOMING!”

If the panicked shout over everyone’s comms hadn’t scared X out of his sleepiness, the resulting explosion of one of the trucks would have.

There was a moment of silent affirmation as everyone looked out of their respective windows to see the last truck in the convoy go up in flames, X’s own core going still for a moment as he watched the vehicle turn into a pile of blackened metal, any of the poor souls trapped inside being lost in the initial explosion.

What happened next could only be described as absolute chaos. All of the Neo Arcadians began shouting, calling for orders, formations, confirmation on where the attack was coming from. X grabbed his buster, leaping out of the door and hitting the ground running as his scanner picked up dozens of enemies.

“They’re surrounding us, don’t let them cut us off from the city!” X called over the comms, shooting a pantheon as he ran by, the creature raising its weapon to begin firing at the convoy.

Plasma shots and missiles flew out of every corner of their path, the trucks being peppered with fire as they slid to a stop. 

X didn’t have time to let himself grieve as he heard the cries of the Neo Arcadians being shot down by their enemies, only able to concern himself with eliminating as many of them as he could. The faster he destroyed the mechaniloids, the more of the Neo Arcadians would survive.

Mega Man X tore through droves of enemies, the Dark Elf’s presence completely muted to him as he fought to ensure their survival. Decades of fighting experience came back to him, every movement he made feeling as natural as it ever had.

He had almost forgotten he had been built for combat by his hypocritical father, all those years ago. A being that strove for peace but had been built for war.

“Master X, help! Please!” 

One lone cry that rang out above all else gave X pause, snapping his attention around back towards the caravan. 

It was a massacre, the sheer amount of pantheons and mechaniloids easily overwhelming the Neo Arcadian forces. The same people X had shared the day with now lay in varying piles of burnt, destroyed parts and synthetic flesh.

The voice that had called out to him was one of the young men who had escorted him that morning, his eyes wide in terror as a pantheon warrior gripped his body in its massive, mechanical arm.

The man reached out for X, his eyes pleading as he gasped one last time before the pantheon crushed his body, tossing him aside as it turned its horrible gaze to X.

X could only stare, rooted to the spot in agony as he had watched the reploid’s death. It was happening again, his supposed “power” not enough to save the very reploids who looked up to him. They needed him, and he could only stand by and watch as they died.

“X, move! Now!”

Tria’s shout didn’t register to him, but the explosion at X’s feet did. His entire body was thrown backwards, shrapnel decimating his pristine white and gold armor. He could feel the molten pieces of metal ripping through his body, shredding everything they came in contact with. The little wings on his helmet were ripped off, his legs barely holding on from his thighs down. The pain was so great that X actually didn’t feel it, laying instead gasping in a pool of his own blood.

He didn’t hear Tria’s voice in his ear, telling him he was okay, and that they’d make it out of this. He didn’t see the few remaining Neo Arcadians grab what they could of his armor, his buster and their fallen comrades. He didn’t feel them dragging him towards the last remaining truck and piling what they could in the back.

X could only stare at the ceiling of the truck, feeling it rumble as it sped away from the horror scene. Tria’s face entered his vision, wiping his hair from his eyes and speaking to him to keep him calm. The poor reploid couldn’t have known that X could barely understand him, his processor dedicated to keeping him from experiencing the full effect of what could only have been a grenade detonating against his legs.

X didn’t know how long he sat there, his eyes flickering from Tria’s face to the roof of the truck. He wanted to go home, he wanted to be back in his bed, his body hurting from the seal and having boring meetings all day. 

He wanted Zero back. He must have spoken Zero’s name accidentally, simply because of Tria’s reaction. The man reached around and grabbed X’s buster, holding it out in front of him and saying something along the lines of “I don’t know who Zero is, but here, maybe this will help? Just stay calm Master X, we’re almost home…”

X wanted to reach up, grab the buster and throw it away. His arms, however, stubbornly refused his call to move. Tria couldn’t have known that X was talking about his long lost partner, and not him not having a weapon.

Maybe, Zero wouldn’t be so long lost anymore...X could feel his life draining around him, death closing in on him like the gentle embrace of night.

The truck stopped, X could feel it by how the inertia moved his body. It felt like too much was open to the air and sliding around, unstable and free. 

That wasn’t right, in fact it was quite rude of his body to be so open like that.

How dare it.

X turned his head to the back of the truck, watching as Tria jumped out to meet Dr. Weil and the rest of the council. He was speaking quite animatedly, panic clearly written on his face. 

Weil nodded, taking X’s buster from Tria’s hand as he listened. X wondered why no one was rushing to help him, or panic over his broken body. 

Perhaps they’d come after they helped Tria, X knew he needed it.

Weil nodded again, still holding X’s buster in his hands.

With one hand, he charged the pistol and leveled it at Tria’s head.

The resounding shot shocked X, but the sound of the Captain’s body hitting the floor shocked him more. What the hell just happened?

Something bitter filled X, overcoming the encroaching blackness of death. That simple act of merciless violence snapped something in the android. Was it rage he felt? Indignation?

Or was it a realization of sorts?

X wouldn’t have time to think it over, the veil of night finally covering his eyes as Weil turned to him. For the first time in X’s long, long life, he felt genuine fear as he gazed into those dark eyes.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Magnificent...his entire body is magnificent...I never had the chance to work so closely on him.”

X’s consciousness danced at the edges of awareness, catching a man's voice as he felt hands all over his body.

He decided he didn’t like that before disappearing again.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Damnit, I needed him dead, why can’t anyone do one fucking job correctly…”

X was more aware this time, and he really wished he hadn’t been. Something was being taken from him, he could feel it, something deep inside his code being ripped from him.

He wanted to scream, but had no way to do so.

X faded again.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“If I can’t break the seal...I will weaken it until this bastard machine dies.”

X’s eyes flew open, the pain hitting him so quickly it caused his processor to short out for a moment. Everything inside him felt like it was on fire, the Dark Elf’s code wreaking havoc on his own stripped body.

He knew Weil was in the room, he could sense him. He also knew in that moment what Weil had been doing.

The system errors he was getting were too deliberate, too perfect. Bits of code taken here, pieces of his systems missing there. 

X was being stripped for parts while he was still alive. The thought alone made him violently ill, that he was being taken apart from the inside by the people he trusted.

He knew Weil, the man had been there to help him create Neo Arcadia, he had helped X with everything since the day Zero left.

How could he do this? Why?

X paused his morbid ministrations, noting that Weil had left the room. This was his chance. Like hell he would stay here and let the man he had once called trusted root around his insides like he was some experiment.

The android heaved himself to the side, gasping as he felt the remnants of his torn body collapsing off of the table and onto the floor. The pain made him cry out, his whole being shaking violently from the stress of movement. 

X hazarded a look down, trying to assess the damage. Things were not where they were supposed to be. His entire torso had been opened up, mechanical parts and reploid “blood” barely staying inside of his body. His armor had been peeled off of him, his legs barely held together. He looked like a mechanical skeleton.

He whimpered, trying not to make himself sick at the imagery, his own body horror driving his need to escape even higher.

His helmet was still seated on his head, and his scanner still worked. Perfect.

With a great deal of effort, the skeletal remains of Mega Man X stood, one arm wrapped around his midsection while the other kept him steady, helping him regain his balance.

Escape. Run, X!

The voice in his head prompted him to move, whether it was his own or maybe his father’s, he didn’t know. He simply began moving, the lab that had contained him scattered with pieces of his armor and body.

With shaking hands, X grabbed and replaced what he could, pain clouding his thoughts. The only thing he could make out was escape.

Once sufficiently repaired enough to move faster, X stepped out from the lab, noting it was one very close to Yggdrasil. The Dark Elf’s seal felt so much more active than ever before, fire racing through his code as the virus rewrote him and attempted to corrupt him. 

X grimaced, turning away from the direction of Yggdrasil, and focusing instead on making it down the hallway. Every step sent pain lancing through his body, but he grit his teeth and kept moving. 

If I can make it back to the garage...I can take a truck and escape…

God but where will I go? What will I do? Fuck, this is bad. This is really bad....

X tried not to whine, despair flooding him as he realized he had no plan other than escape. Maybe he could go and die somewhere in the desert, somewhere Weil couldn’t touch him. Maybe he would find Zero…

“Hey! There he is, he’s over there!” 

A shout, followed by footsteps rang out of the hallway. X turned as fast as his shaking body would let him. Reploid guards stood further down the hall, calling to one another before running towards him.

“Shit...shit shit shit…” X hissed under his teeth, forcing his body to pick up the pace. His knees wobbled and threatened to give out under him, a hobbled trot the only thing he was capable of. The hallway turned, leading into a straight corridor with windows on either side. 

They were gaining on him, and X knew he wouldn’t outrun them here. He eyed the windows further down, panic building in his throat.

If that was his only means of escape, then so be it.

With a cry, X ripped the remnant of his charred white and gold armor from his chest, the last piece of the armor he had been forced to wear. He turned and threw it towards the curve of the hallway, not watching as he heard the satisfying thunk as it hit the closest pursuer as they turned the corner.

X hobbled as quickly as he could, his eyes glued to the one open window. Other reploids and his own council appeared at the other end of the hallway, Dr. Weil leading them as they all attempted to catch him.

Weil looked furious, his hands reaching out for X as they all sped closer.

X wondered for a brief moment who would reach what first. Would he reach the window first, or would Weil catch him before then? The panic and pseudo-adrenaline coursing through him told him that he needed to reach the window first.

Everything else disappeared as X’s vision narrowed onto the open window sill, his hands reaching out for the frame. 

He couldn’t have known that Weil had almost grabbed him by his hair as he launched himself out of it, into the crashing ocean below.

As X twisted and turned in the air, free falling into the roaring sea, he realized that Weil had planned all of this. Weil meant for him to die on that patrol.

Weil had betrayed him, and all of Neo Arcadia. No, he had betrayed all of the life on earth, jeopardized everything that X had sacrificed so much for. Everything that Zero had sacrificed himself for.

As X’s body hit the water, he decided that was truly unforgivable.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“You are all FUCKING IDIOTS!” Weil roared in rage as X leaped out of the window, taking everything Weil had been working on with him.

TK-31 shrank deeper into the shadows, he wasn’t having a very good day. How unfortunate could one get to find themselves in the middle of an attempted assassination/coup?

“You should have killed him while he was in your lab Weil, what are we going to do if he comes back?” one of the council members, a shorter man with a balding head spoke up, gesturing to the open window.

“I couldn’t have killed him, anyone who looked into how he died would have seen that it was deliberate! The reploid boy ruined it by throwing a grenade at his damn feet, X was supposed to die to a fucking saber.” Weil turned to the man, shaking in wrath.

Why would anyone try to kill Master X? Wasn’t he the only thing keeping the Dark Elf asleep?

“If he had died this morning on the patrol like I had planned, none of this would be happening. It would have been clean, with no damage to his hardware so I could take his parts to repair Omega and bring back the Dark Elf! That stupid boy I sent to escort him this morning KNEW that when we set the trap!” Weil collided his fist with the shorter man's face, sending him reeling.

“If he had died this morning to pantheons, we could have framed it to the humans that it was the reploids’ fault, getting them on our side and finally destroying the rest of these idiot reploids. We wouldn’t have had to cover our tracks because these stupid humans would have believed any lie we spoon fed them about their glorious leader’s death.”

“Instead, we now have no X, no Dark Elf, and only pieces of X’s data.” Weil finished, his hands still held in fists at his sides.

Frame reploids? For Master X’s death? But why? That would cause war, reploid kind would be falsely persecuted, X would become a martyr for nothing.

Something about the whole situation made TK-31 angry, indignant that someone was attempting to use Master X’s name to cause suffering.

He couldn’t do much about it though...

Best to stay hidden for now, his message for Master X clearly wasn’t going to get delivered.

“Doctor, do you really think he would have survived that fall?” one of the other council members, a thin, tall woman spoke up. Her face was gaunt as she watched the scene unfold around her.

“Let’s hope that he didn’t. In the meantime, we need a solution for X’s disappearance. He still makes his rounds and meetings. No one can know that he’s gone.” Weil grumbled, making his way towards the hallway X had run from.

Dr. Weil turned his back to TK-31, this was his chance! The messenger reploid began creeping away, sticking to the shadows and hoping that his blonde hair wouldn’t give him away.

Wait…

Weil stopped in front of what looked like a piece of scrap metal. Stooping down, he picked it up, smiling devilishly as he did.

“I think I have a plan for our missing leader. I don’t think anyone would notice if he had been replaced with a Copy…” Weil chuckled darkly, turning to face the remaining humans and reploids in the hall. “No one is to speak of what happened here tonight. If you do, there will be consequences.”

Weil turned from the council, the armor in hand, and began walking back to his lab.

The man couldn’t have known about the little messenger reploid staring in horror as he hid around the corner.

He had seen the whole thing! TK-31 trembled, he couldn’t tell anyone about this, he had to keep quiet.

The reploid slipped away, going down the opposite hallway as Weil had, desperately wishing he hadn’t been seen.

[gunkreads]

Hater mode, engage: (negative Harry Potter takes incoming)

The Harry Potter game thing is funny to me specifically because I am like... THE generation that should be obsessed with it. I quite literally grew up reading them and I did develop a significant amount of my early reading comprehension skills from them. Then, at a certain point around when the 5th book came out, I realized that I genuinely could not fucking care less about them. I still finished them because people slapped the books in front of me as soon as they came out and I had nothing better to do, but about the halfway mark of the series left me thinking "what the fuck is all this for?" and never provided an answer.

Today, I exclusively think about Harry Potter when someone else makes me. I try not to hold any active derision to people who still like it, but again, if I, a fantasy-loving guy who grew up as the books were coming out, have literally ZERO attachment to them, I just... don't get it. They're just a blank spot to me. I could tell you a good chunk of what happens in them, but none of it mattered to me.

The point here is that a... secondary acquaintance who's like 2-3 years older than me is apparently a HUGE HP fan, to paraphrase "because her childhood sucked and that's how she got through", and is very excited about the new game. I genuinely just... how? I know you've moved on, read better books--her favorite author is Terry Pratchett for christ's fucking sake--so how the fuck are you still latched on to this? I mean, hell, I still have rose-colored glasses for Eragon, but I'm not going BACK to it! If they released an Eragon game next year I'd probably sue the publishers for emotional assault and battery!

After about the age of 13, I realized that Harry Potter had one of the absolute lamest takes on magic possible and that I could find more interesting and cool magic in just about any other children's fantasy. By that time, I was already moving on to YA and adult fantasy, so HP just... disappeared from my brain. It's genuinely unfathomable to me that people actually hung on to it. Again, I get rose-colored glasses, but aren't you done? Aren't you tired of hearing all the same names and places for over a decade since the series finished? Man, sure, keep writing the fanfiction and making the art or whatever, but... can we cool it on the multimillion dollar franchise resuscitation? Can we just this once not let the nostalgia take over?

You may notice I didn't mention Rowling's name. This is because she's a wretched and broken waste of oxygen; other people have written more eloquent breakdowns of the generalized and focused bigotry in her ideas and in her books than I can.

The point of this post is just to express disbelief that anyone still manages to find $60-70 worth of care for Harry Potter anymore. Not going to tag it because 1: go ahead and have your fun, 2: I'm juuuuuuust smart enough to not actively dance in a burning building.

[glamgoblin]

TAG SOMEONE YOU WANT TO KNOW AND/OR SOME OF YOUR BESTIES

Tagged by: @newyearknwwme HI BUDDY! Thank you for the tag! 🫶🏻🫶🏻 Sorry this took awhile!!

Last song: Sleeping In - Postal Service (I'm a sleepy baby idc that sleep is not what the song is about, it is to ME)

Last movie: it's been mostly Halloween rewatches lately, sooo aadams family and halloweentown rewatches! I finally saw Unicorn wars too! and got to see a mini preview of the boy and the heron (thank you film friend who are cooler than me)

Currently watching: My Dear Gangster Oppa. It's! So! Good! Like unfairly good for a mafia x gamer boy show

Other stuff I watched this year: oh soooo many things! Most recently Only Friends, but I cannot explain the grip that LITA has on me after I watched it this year. Also a lot of play throughs of games and video essays. Oh! My Beautiful Man Eternal!

Shows I dropped/didn’t finish: I try so hard to finish shows because I am stubborn! But....TharnType, I could NOT get past the first few episodes. I have tried. More than once. I'm sorry besties. Also My School President. I have one episode left! I will go back to it! I will! 🫣

Currently reading: Drive Your Plow Over the Bones of the Dead by Olga Tokarczuk (also shout out to the translation work on this one!) and! There There by Tommy Orange

Currently listening to: She's the Prettiest Girl at the Party, and She Can Prove it with a Solid Right Hook - Frank Iero (long song titles giving me nostalgia, but seriously this song gives me so many emotions)

Currently working on : avoiding responsibility lots of kinnporsche and LITA fics, and perhaps a bg3 fic

tagging @padfootstolemycrumpets @ella-norah @wintercrushes @virtualbearfox and @loveable-sea-lemon if you want to but absolutely zero pressure!

[katakyu]

"Welcome Home" Scara and Ei (mother-son)

had a narrative essay for my LA class 3 months ago and i wrote about scara lol

decided to share it on here since why not (:

┊❀┊Summary: Scara comes back to Inazuma and unexpectedly finds himself in front of his mother. Overwhelmed with his emotions, he couldn't help but pour it all out.

┊❀┊A bit angsty? More comfort

The gentle breeze of Inazuma. It was always calming to Scaramouche. As he roamed the streets, passing by each field of grass, soft petals of sakura trees had fallen onto him. The more he walked, the greater the increase of petals and leaves to capture his attention. There he was, in the beauty of Inazuma City. It had long changed from when he was last there. It felt more vibrant compared to the dull times in the past. As he entered the city, no one had paid any mind to him, not even noticing he was there. It felt reassuring to Scaramouche. Encapsulated by every new aspect of the place he once knew, Scaramouche reminiscences over the world. Big waves of nostalgia had hit him with every sight to take in. The cheering and jumping of little children waiting for crafts to be made, the pleasant scent of miso soup from several food vendors, and the feeling of being home. Soon he arrived at the Raiden Shogun’s abode. The presence of his mother, Ei, could very well be behind the closed doors. Should he entertain his curiosity? It was a question that continuously ran through his mind. So much so, that the Shogun had left her home, now in each other’s complete field of view.

“Well if it isn’t the Raiden Shogun herself.” Scaramouche scoffed at her excellency, shooting a distasteful look towards her, disrespecting her status as Inazuma’s archon. Ei showed a sorrowful smile, in shock of the figure standing before her.

“Kunikuzushi? Is it truly you?” Her voice was gentle and soft as if she would hurt the poor man by speaking any louder. Scaramouche was taken aback by the calling of his real name. It was a name he hadn’t heard in so long, could Ei have known anything about him currently? Did she ever try to get back into contact with him? Had she forgotten about him throughout the years? Confusing thoughts and questions spiraled into his mind. Even the mere sight of Ei made him want to cry out every burden on his shoulders. Scaramouche shook to reality once Ei took a step closer to him.

“I’ve missed you so much. Have you been well?” Her smile towards him felt genuine, like a ray of sunlight through dark rainy clouds. The kindness in her words angered Scaramouche. Was she always like this? Why would she leave him if she was this kind mannered?

“You left me. Don’t act like you know me as much as the next person.” Scaramouche delivered his line sharply, “Do you expect me to believe that after all these years, I would just let all the pain and suffering you’ve caused me go out of question?”

“Kuni.. I couldn’t have done anything. It was out of my control, I had no purpose to keep you but I didn’t want to completely destroy you either.” Ei’s response was with no bad intentions, yet it scraped on Scaramouche’s skin, irritating him further.

"You could have done so much! You thought of me more as a mere human vessel. Wasn't I supposed to be having the traits of your late sister? Your love for her, why hadn't any of it gone to me? You know, if you were more aware of the world, maybe you'd realise what happened to me. The fatui took me in and physically toyed with me. I may be an artificial being, but I understood just how cruel it felt. Where were you all this time? You said it yourself, Ei! You..had no purpose for me!" Scaramouche's eyes filled with tears ready to stream down like a cascading waterfall. 

Ei was confused. She understood that her actions had hurt him, but she had zero idea as to just how much else he had to go through. It was a devastating sight.

Scaramouche, filled with anger and confusion, removed his hat and looked directly at Ei with his tear filled eyes, "Nothing could compare to the pain I had to go through in such a period of time.." his tears now falling down his cheeks, staining his skin. His words choked through small cries, "..Looking at you and remembering what caused my dismay, you are single handedly the biggest struggle that I had to work through. You never cared to look for me, you just.. you just weren't there! Ever!"

As Scaramouche rambled on about his frustrations, Ei quietly walked up to him and brought him to a tight embrace. Humming a soothing tune, quickly making Scaramouche quiet.

"I'm sorry I hadn't been there for you, my dear. If only I hadn't been so blinded by the thought of eternity and the future of the nation, maybe you wouldn't have felt such inconveniences. I truly am sorry, Kunikuzushi. I wasn't there for you then, but I am here now. And I'd like to keep it that way." Ei stroked Scaramouche’s hair in a way to try and comfort him. 

"You think an apology could fix all the mishaps and chaos you've created?" Scaramouche still tried to remain tough even in such a situation, whispering a content message under his breath, "You've no clue just how much I've needed to hear those words from you.."

Alas, Scaramouche succumbs to the warm embrace of his mother, finally letting go and becoming vulnerable with Ei. His crying stained Ei's clothes, the sad state of her son in front of her very eyes. Ei tightened her grip on Scaramouche, like he was a precious item scared to be taken away from her. 

Small tears flowed down her cheek as she spoke in a gentle manner, "Welcome home."

┊❀┊ Thanks for reading<3 i hope it's okay.

[danwylds]

ive followed you for so long but you never talk about video games lol what have been your favorite? besides the last of us i mean

OMG okay I don’t tend to talk abt video games but I do really enjoy a bunch of them!! Let me preface by saying I will like nearly anything I play and I straight up do not care abt reviews

I like the obvious big games like the Witcher series, tes (morrowind specifically), resident evil series (the second one will forever be in my heart), and yeah tlou has rotted my brain for years LMFAO

Anyways I’m going to ramble extensively abt all the games I like in no order I’m very sorry

Other than the bigger games that almost everyone knows and enjoys, my favourites have definitely been bloodborne, which is a bigger game but means a bonkers amount to me

I looovvve survival horror games which might be obvious, so sweet home is obviously one I’ve played. There are definitely better out there (alien isolation in particular is one I’m super fond of!), and i like other games in that genre like the amnesia series (including the unofficial sequel), as well as newer series like the dark pictures anthology! And u know what putting last of us in here as well and saying I don’t like the second game all that much but it was very good AND LAYERS OF FEAR GD LAYERS OF FEAR. MAN. okay will stop talking abt horror games i will talk so much abt them if left unchecked

Im a SUCKER for classics too, like street fighter and LoZ series, and final fantasy as well! Sonic games as well but I didn’t played them that often so the most I really get from them is nostalgia </3 sorry sonic fans

ARCANUM. I LOVE THIS GAME SOOO MUCH !!!!!! It’s so goofy and interesting and low intelligence runs are my favourite thing of all time actually it’s everything to me … shitty ass graphics and all

Speaking of dumbass character building, love disco elysium (like everyone in this world does tbh excellent game) and vampire masquerade !! VtM is so fun I loce being deranged in that game kfndkdn

Cube escape paradox doesn’t really belong with any of these games, but I had a blast playing it with my friend (: super interesting puzzle game and we were confused for abt 5 hours trying to get through it all

Okay lightning round of games i love but won’t go into it— abzû, subnautica, hades, stardew valley, minecraft, sims, dark souls, dead by daylight, ace attorney, hollow knight, destiny, assassins creed series, god of war, ghost of Tsushima, half life, coral island, undertale, horizon zero dawn, omori, undecember, fallout, 20 minutes till dawn, hunt showdown, someday you’ll return (haven’t finished but very very good so far!)

Okay lightning round of games i love but won’t go into any depth abt- stardew valley, slime rancher, minecraft, sims, coral island, life is strange, destiny, dead by daylight, portal, assassins creed, ghosts of tsushima, dark souls, half life, god of war, ace attorney, hollow knight, abzû, subnautica

[dukeofriven]

So today at a friend's place my friend got me to watch the first episode of Trigun Stampede. I have never seen any Trigun, knew literally nothing about it except that the name would pop-up on TV Tropes a lot back in the day. My friend was a fan of the original and wanted to give the remake a shot. As the episode went on my friend got more and more aggravated, frequently making confused and irritated noises like a cat locked in an unheated bathroom, so that I could only surmise he wasn't enjoying the television programme. I was finding it kind of awkward and often off-putting, tiresomely sexist, and I just generally disliked its visual style (but then that's not specific to Trigun Stampede as I feel like '3D CGI' anime has yet to hit its stride—from Arpeggio of Blue Steel to Beastars the character models still feel leaden and droopy, their balance all wrong, and the framerate choices that should make them look more like tradition animation just make things look jerky.) The episode wasn't terrible, but it felt generic and forgettable, another anime that felt like I'd seen it before. After it was over my friend turned to me, ashen faced, and said 'what the fuck did they do to Trigun?' Then he made me watch the first episode of the original. It felt like watching a completely different show. It contextualized ever single choice the remake had made—and every choice it made was wrong. Where the new one felt sexist, the old one felt progressive. Where the new one felt aimless, bouncing from space opera to quasi-western, the old one had a razor-sharp sense of theme and genre. Where the new one's Vash felt like that druggie who tries to hold Bruce Willis up at the start of Fifth Element, the old Vash was a pitch-perfect balance of a guy who could ooze shonen cool one moment and then act like a total dork the next, with neither element feeling incongruous to his character. I sat there slack-jawed and baffled and began to understand why my friend had been so appalled. Why would you take an empowered female leader and make her a childish rookie? Why would you replace a fascinatingly unusual female character with an old alcoholic male asshole who spends the entire episode belittling his young female partner with misogynistic taunts? Why would you so clearly take every one of Trigun's narrative secrets and spill them all in the opening scene, then bookend the episode with a cartoonish villain playing a scary organ and all-but twirling a moustache> The original Trigun oozes confidence and charm - it feels like the sequel to Cowboy Bebop that I never knew existed, from the action sequences to the character design to the cocky assurance with which it just drops you into its world and makes no attempts to set it up for you: you are here, enjoy. Trigun Stampede seems terrified you might not instantly be invested in its deep lore so its non-stop exposition dumps from start to finish, with no mystery left by episode's end, everyone's motivation and backstory seemingly explained and squared away.

Hell, I watched the OG Trigun with its truly awful English dub and still felt riveted to the screen. I have never seen Trigun before. I have zero skin in the game, no childhood nostalgia to defend, no identity-forming anime obsession to shore-up as the backbone my existence. I give no goddamn weeb shits about Trigun. But I watched two episode of TB today: episode 1 of Trigun Stampede and the episode 1 of Trigun, and the former ditches every single element that makes the latter good. Every. Single. One. I have rarely watched a remake that seemed to so utterly and totally miss the point. If Stampede's only goal was to make me go 'man, this remake makes the original look amazing I'm going to ditch this show and watch that instead' well then it exceed. Otherwise, who the hell is this for? Why does this exist? MERYL GETS HANDLED ROUGHLY ENOUGH BUT WHAT THE SHIT DID YOU DO TO MILLY?

[animehouse-moe]

Bleach 8: The Shooting Star Project

The opening act of this episode was really outstanding. How they framed death and tragedy in the wake of the Wandenreich was really poetic, and speaks a great deal to Kubo's ability. Not having one of the Squad Captains be the one that hovers over Yamamoto's body in hesitation, but a faceless character that turns away to help the other wounded just has some sort of incredible feel to it.

It's like they brought a God down to a man with this one moment. The most powerful Shinigami within Soul Society is left to be naught but another body that litters the ground.

In the same vein I loved this moment with Kyouraku. Very in your face symbolism to the massive hole left in both him, and the rest of Soul Society.

Overall, the first act of the episode carries such an impressive sense of sorrow and hollowness, with the direction really just selling it incredibly well. The dark and overcast sky full of rain, the dimly lit and flickering spaces where people rush to tend to the wounded, the quiet and sparse soundtrack alongside the muted voices of most of the characters. It really sells the emotion of it well, and even sneaks symbolism into it all. The heavy rains slow to nothing but a drip that inevitably runs dry, leaving nothing but the quiet and black sky. It's a really beautiful piece to personify the sorrow of Soul Society.

However, Kubo realizes that we've know been on a pretty intense run of episodes, and we get really solid timing on the first bits of comedy and gags in TYBW! A very much needed piece, and one that I didn't realize I was missing as much as I was until we got into it. I was just smiling like a goofball thinking about the first time I watched Bleach and got to comedic moments like that.

Ichigo's expression through it all really is such a catalyst to flashbacks. All the way to Yoruichi in her cat form, or Ichigo's moments with Nel when he first heads to Heuco Mundo. Just such a classic feel that ignites that nostalgia in your heart.

It's just got all the right notes for that classic feel.

Even though the opening was dramatic, and we get a bunch of new information and thoughts as Ichigo returns with Squad Zero, I have to say that overall the comedy is what made this episode for me. It's just something that really stuck with me when I originally watched Bleach as a kid, so getting to see it once more after so long just feels special. The action is of course the action, but we've had that for 8 episodes now, and this is the first we're really getting of the comedy. More so than satisfying my interest in quality and the story in general, it feels like this episode just really appeals to the kid version of me that excitedly waited for each new episode to drop, similar to how I excitedly await each episode of TYBW.

[doubleddenden]

Okay so I'm thinking about how the Pokémon Day Presents is 20 minutes. I'm usually pessimistic about these because last time it was mobile game garbage with like a minute of okay stuff.

But here's what's guaranteed:

Scarlet and Violet DLC teaser or equivalent. Everyone that's played knows why so there's no point going further

What's most likely coming:

RBY, MAYBE Green for US I doubt it; GSC, and at the least RSE for NSO. I'd say FRLG too but they may opt to ignore it since LGPE exists on Switch. Either way, it's most likely the case due to the Nintendo Direct that announced Gameboy and GBA games but only showed the Pokémon TCG game for then. The trailer for the Presentation also previewed the old school sprites, the RBY intro, the RBG balloons- we know they like nostalgia, it's coming. Couple the GBA games with the events and the fact that 3ds will be closing shop next month, they pretty much are guaranteed to make it available.

PMD- something is being announced. My bet is on an Explorers remake since they recently dropped the OG remake. We know something is up due to the copyright being on the website code showing Spike Chunsoft 1993 to 2023, and unless they're suddenly going to drop Donphan Rompa and have Pikachu have to figure out which of his classmates killed Butterfree, that pretty much just points to PMD.

That alone should comprise at least 15 minutes. We could probably toss in a minute or 2 to casually remind everyone to download all the Pokestuff they can on the 3ds before the end time comes (so basically Bank- which will be free- and the SM demo for Ash Greninja).

Other than this that leaves a little wiggle room. A minute or 5 is guaranteed to be nostalgia bait and probably a montage of photos from the hashtag campaign they did for Twitter recently.

The only thing left I could guess would maybe be the usual rock cast at Pokémon Sleep, but only because it had a recent stir a couple of months back for... I think trademark, I might be wrong, but it was definitely a small behind the scenes ripple.

As always, I'll be praying for some reminder that Colosseum and XD existed. Won't happen because there's just not enough time. But I'll still hope for a third party studio to bring it back some day- and it'd fit since the GBA games will come back.

But anyway, why don't I have fun with a prediction of what the SV dlc will probably look like:

1. Hexagon legendary revealed, basically a piece of it exists in all Terra Orbs and its basically been soft fusion this whole time. Full form probably has something to do with a world turtle, 2 forms: ancient and future, dragon /Psychic type

2. New uniforms. Not full customization, but probably some special uniform for exploring deeper into Area Zero or some extra variants on the uniforms- maybe even straight up copies of Arven, Nemona, Team Star, and Clavell's uniform variants.

3. Probably mostly going to be artwork, couple of new characters locked to versions, and probably the professor OPPOSITE to the one we worked with- aka Arven's parent that bailed shortly after his birth- showing up suddenly.

4. 2 parts most likely, maybe a third if they really want to milk this. Hexagon is one part. The "Imagined" Pokémon the other (the Johto Beasts and Unovan Swords hybrids). Potential third is up in the air. One location is probably deeeeeeper into AZ and sort of a Hollow World (kinda like Halo 4). The other most likely that chunk on the north east of Paldea. My next guess would be islands way off the coast since apparently Paldea's oceans just go on forever, according to a recent Boundary Break video on SV- Essentially plenty of space for it.

5. More Paradox Pokémon. If I were a betting man- and I do enjoy gacha- I'd wager either paradoxes for Kanto starters OR Sinnoh starters since they basically got left in the rain for new forms. Probably Kanto because they love jacking Charizard off and Ohmori can't go one game without giving his favorite special privileges. But if they ever wanted to drop Gorochu, it's now or never. Probably an ancient pokemon with either a future counterpart or Eevee or Meowth gets a future counterpart.

6. a forgotten Pokémon gets a new form and evolution akin to Slowbro. Betting on Oddish or Poliwag, or generally a Pokémon with a split evolution so they can milk it like Slowbro in Isle of Armor and Slowking in Crown Tundra.

7. Called something like "Azure Ocean" or "Topaz Tunnel" or "Quartz Quarry"- keeping up with fancy color names.

Of course I could be entirely wrong, none of any of the above happens, and it's just something very, very minor.

[owlixx]

Mega Man Entire Series Thoughts

In the end, I am very glad I did this

I beat roughly 30 games (half of X6, half of MM9)

11.5 classic Mega Man Games (including MM and Bass)

5 Gameboy games

5.5 Mega Man X Games

4 Zero Games

2 ZX Games

2 Power Fighters games

That still leaves the 2 Sega exclusive Mega Man games

Soccer and the racing game

The couple wonderswan games

the japan-only oddities like the rail shooter and the digital board games

X7/8 and Command Mission

Powered Up and Maverick Hunter

The street fighter fangame officially blessed by Capcom

All 3 Legends games

Both GBC X games

Mega Man DOS and DOS 3 (lol)

The entire Battle Network and Star Forces subseries

Of what I played, Id probably rank them as such:

Mega Man Classic

Mega Man ZX

Mega Man Zero

Mega Man X

Mega Man Gameboy

I know that is probably a controversial opinion. I think really the biggest takeaway from all of this for me is that I just don't really click with the X sub series as much as everyone else seems to.

Now, in terms of my favorite and least favorite from each subseries:

Classic - best is hard to determine here. I knew 2 was good, but 3, 7, 8, 10, 11 all genuinely impressed me. Even 4-6 each had really cool parts like the inventive robot masters and weapons. 7 suffers from being rushed, 8 suffers from auto scrolling. I think I am going to have to champion myself here as a MM3 defender for the sheer reason that I had always written it off before but was so impressed by it, but 11 was probably the most sheer fun I had due to the accessibility and instant nostalgia baiting. Worst is probably 4 or 5 for being forgettable, at least 6 had the jet pack that I loved.

Gameboy - Easily the best was V and the worst was III just in terms of completely forgetting III and V having all original masters, but I and II get points from I being more novel and II being easier.

X - Easily X5 is the best and X6 is the worst of what I played, but booting up X7 didn't inspire much confidence. X5 feels like a genuine step up from previous games and justifies being a different series from Classic Mega Man more than just having 16 bit graphics, animal bosses, and annoying hidden upgrades. X5 high on my replay-list for having multiple playable characters and branching paths, even if the branching paths are dumb. X6 is so low because of its horrible, soft-lock based level design, annoying bosses, and mandatory collectibles without a password system to bypass them.

Zero: Best is easily 3, worst is probably 1. 4 felt like it was getting a little long in the tooth, but the finale was so cool that I was left with a good taste in my mouth. 1 Just had the least going on, while also suffering from me going through adjustment pains and not being as good at the Zero games yet, which is a little unfair to it.

ZX: Now this one is a little unfair to call either of 2 "best" or "worst", but I think ZX is the better game just for being a bit more focused in its approach to transformations and story. I don't love the map or the plot itself really, but ZX Advent feels incomprehensible plot-wise and a lot of the transformations feel more like tedium than fun. ZX Advent is higher on my replay list though just because the protagonists have more gameplay differences.

So, my replay list is basically just:

Mega Man 10 as proto or bass

Mega Man 11 on a higher difficulty

Mega Man 7/8 just because I like them

Mega Man X5 as Zero

Mega Man ZX Advent as Grey

Mega Man ZX as Vent

Mega Man 1-6 with checkpoints but without rewind (low priority)

And my remaining play list is basically just:

Legends

Battle Network/Star Force

The 2 remakes

X6/7/8/Command Missions (Low Priority)

MAYBE the wonderswan games

Wily Wars and Mega Man Game Gear

Fangames

Although also on my todo list next time I catch the fever is:

Azure Strike Gunvolt

Shovel Knight (never beat the final boss or did the other campaigns)

Gunman Clive

Might Number Nine

20/30XX

Shantae

In the end, I am really glad I did all this and I had a lot of fun. It never really became a slog for me, since I just adjusted the goalpost the second I started to get frustrated (which was when I booted up Mega Man Xtreme for the GBC lol). The main point was to develop a thorough understanding of this series after starting an 8 hour lore video of the entire mega man timeline, which is why battle network was never part of the initial plan. It's funny, by now that video has largely left my memory despite watching all of it obsessivelly over the course of a few days about a month ago.

In fact, I started this journey on November 27 and finished on December 26. 30 games in under a month. I averaged almost exactly one a day.

Anyways, I feel like I achieved my goal. Mega Man is no longer a mystery to me. When I beat every Metroid, every Sonic, all the handheld Castlevanias, that too was a driving goal there: to be able claim understanding of an entire gaming series.

And part of the point as well is to be able to appreciate the gradual differences from game to game, similar to when I watched every James Bond movie back to back over a month. It is hard to appreciate what makes Mega Man 4 unique (charge shot), or IV GB (shop) or even the little things like having a unique icon for each weapon in the weapon select screen, or weapon hotswapping, without playing them all in the exact order they came out. What makes Zero 3 the best Zero game? What is the difference between ZX and Advent? How do all these different subseries look and play differently? You can read about all that, but you can't appreciate it without playing them, even if my appreciation was obscured by playing these games on the easiest difficulties or with outright cheats enabled.

And part of it too was just to meet all 88 robot masters, 64 mavericks, etc. and get to know the weird ones and the dumb ones and the fan favorites and everything in between. Again, you can access that information online, but you can't intuitively detect how charming Gravity Man's level is or how useful Metal Blade is or a 1000 little unique things you can pick up on, most of them really not even on a first playthrough, especially not one like most of mine, but I know a heck of a lot more about Mega Man than I did a month ago.

Already it has been amazing to watch speedruns of 7, 8, Zero 1-4. I am looking forward to seeing ZX run at AGDQ 2023 in just a couple weeks. There is now no music from the series that I haven't heard before.

I am aware that my status as a Mega Man fan is kind of...second class. Playing the games now versus back in the day kind of mandates that. I don't think emulation is inherently "dirty" or even necessarily too "different" from the way these games were originally played, but I can't recreate the context. I can't rent Mega Man 2 from blockbuster and scramble to beat it over a weekend, taking turns with a friend or family member. I can't restrict my knowledge to what gets printed in the issue of Nintendo Power I begged my mom to pick up at the store. Most of all, I can't willingly recreate the patience and tenacity of getting one of these games for Christmas and having to make due with it for months and months at a time, inviting over neighborhood kids to help make progress. I didn't play every single NES game that came out before it, and then every Atari 2600 game before that, and then arcade games of the time as well for all the extra context. And obviously I cheated the hell out of these games so that I could get through them quickly on my first time through.

But I am much more of a Mega Man fan than I used to be, and I'll be right there cheering every time the little blue guy gets a new game announced. I'll scream my lungs out when they announce Mega Man 12, or X9, or Legends 3, or ZX3, or Zero 5, or Battle Network 7, or Star Force 4, or god forbid Mega Man VI in the style of the original GamebBoy (or even Xtreme 3 in the style of the gameboy color LOL). I'll carry along the history of the canceled Legends 3, Maverick Hunter, and Universe games. They're running out of old games to remaster after Battle Network next year, so hopefully that turns into new momentum for Mega Man.

I've kind of shot myself in the foot once again, just like I did with Metroid and Castlevania, getting excited for dead series, or just painfully slow in the case of Metroid. Sonic was kind of in a coma as well when I played those games, although he's since woken back up this year.

I think the big question is: what is the next step for me? The answer is definitely nothing even related to Mega Man for a while. My next retro binge could be anything: Mario and Donkey Kong Country as classic platforming series. I am suddenly remembering that I played almost every Pokemon game as one of my retro binges, and put a good dent in the Final Fantasy series more recently. Kirby is a contender for sure. Modern Fire Emblem isn't crazy. I did most of the MGS series as another binge within the last year or so. I also beat every Kingdom Hearts game not so long ago. So in a nutshell, plus some other stray thoughts, including some more modern game series I have been meaning to play/finish/replay:

Mario

Donkey Kong Country

Kirby

Fire Emblem

Tomb Raider

Splinter Cell

God of War

Crash Bandicoot

Spyro the Dragon

Ratchet and Clank

Sly Cooper

(Paper) Mario (RPG) (and Luigi)

Resident Evil?

Pokemon Mystery Dungeon

More modern:

Bioshock 1-2 + Infinite

Fallout 3 -> NV -> 4

Phoenix Wright

Yakuza 0-6

Dragon Age O -> 2 -> Inquisition

Persona 3-5

And finally assorted visual novels:

Ghost Trick

Hotel Dusk 1-2

AI the Somnium files

Danganronpa

Disco Elysium (kinda)

But here is what I am actually going to play next:

Sonic Frontiers - Loved Sonic Prime and Im halfway through but just been busy with Mega Man

Hades - gf is playing for first time so I have itch to replay, its already my number one favorite video game of all time with a bullet

Fortnite - I wanna get doom slayer this season

Whatever my best friend plays - Could be Danganronpa, Crisis Core, Death Stranding, Phoenix Wright, Dragon Age

Vampire Survivors - been meaning to get the DLC as soon as I finish Mega Man

Anyways, this ended up being way too rambling, but I needed to get all this off my chest. Bottom line, I love Mega Man now.

[lesren]

Neon Absurdity

“…that I can’t find its meaning?” I mused out.

“Da, that is the point.” He responded simply.

I don’t recall the last time I took this headset off; it was hot I was sure of it; my skin was slick and the air thick. A rancid stench attacked my nostrils, but if I focused solely on only what my eyes and ears told me, I would get lost and the real world would fade away, out of mind. I was tired, I know I’ve been up a long time. My body ached and every breath felt like I was drowning. It was quiet for a while, and I looked around, confusion overtook me, and a haze set in as I stood up. We were suddenly loaded into a phone booth.

“What’s your name again?” I said, looking at them.

“You know my name…” He paused before realizing my confusion. “Just my username is fine."

It took me a moment to move my eyes up and read his username "Смерть.” I wasn’t sure how to pronounce it, especially given my friend's Slavic accent.

“Should I just call you C?"

“Whatever is good." he simply replied.

“I feel like I’ve heard your name before, have we met?”

“Yes…and no.” He simply replied.

After greeting him I looked around this familiar place. The place you load into is a phone booth, and once you exit it you find yourself in a concrete courtyard between four buildings. I start to walk to the only open door, covered with dead TV static, simply labeled "№ 1".

We walked through, to be greeted by large windows to our right, showing the static of a dead TV screen. In front of us was a mirror, showing our avatars. To our left were stairs to go up and explore this world. Above the mirror № 1 showed four symbols * * * *, and a picture of a maze. My mind took a few minutes to understand that I was not in my real body. I looked much younger, though I do not recall what I really looked like. A pale pudgy child with dark hair and too thick glasses. This, I was sure of it, wasn’t my real body. This was just in fact, a bunch of ones and zeros. Though it felt real, it at least fooled my sight and hearing, which was enough that I stopped focusing on it. C had a simple avatar, a pale slim man with black hair and clothes, dark bags sagged under his eyes. He appeared as if he’d never slept. As we made our way up the stairs, we were greeted by a hallway with many apartment doors. Almost everything on the walls was written in Cyrillic, a language I was unfamiliar with.

“Did you grow up in a place like this? I mean, like in brutalist-style apartments.”

“Maybe, other than the strangeness of this world. It gives off a…I’m not sure the English word for the feeling.”

“Nostalgia?" I asked.

“Da.” He replied, nodding his head. “Did you grow up here?”

“I’m not sure…it feels nostalgic, I’ve been here in the real world, but I don’t recall when or why.”

I couldn’t find a solid memory that placed me here, but I walked the yellowed musty hallways and made my way around. I must’ve unconsciously known where to go, we entered this room I call the mailroom. It's six stories tall and has nothing but overfilling mailboxes. From the overstuffed mailboxes low-poly mail drifts down like snow. Seven chairs sit in the middle of the room, surrounding an eighth knocked-over chair, which no matter how much I try to move it, my hand passes through it, unable to fix it.

“Why fix it?” C said

“Because…" I struggled to think of a why. "I want them to all be upright." I settled on.

"There doesn’t always have to be order." C retorted.  I stood up from my hunched position trying to move the chair, my eyes strained and I closed them for a moment, moving my hand to my temple, trying to think through the haze.

"Just makes more sense to have order."

C would just reply with a dissatisfied hmph. He started to walk to the next area, I lagged behind him, upset at the question. Though I wasn’t sure why. We walked for a long time, taking in the world around us. It's interesting to walk through this world, unlike the real world, the impossible can become possible. The yellowed hallways go on forever, mind-bending twists and turns, and a subway train goes up the wall where an elevator is supposed to be. A sight that repeats itself. 

I’m sure it means something, this whole world has too. But I’ve yet to understand it and possibly I never will, and it pains me. C I think notices this as we enter the second area, he speaks up without turning around.

"I’ll never understand why people get upset by those thoughts."

"What thoughts?" I retorted

"Trying to know the meaning of the world. You know you’ll never be able to know it." He said plainly.

"Weren’t you the one that said everything has meaning?"

"Yes, but your efforts would be better spent reconciling the fact that your world is absurd." He replied.

I didn’t understand. I don’t know if I can with this haze. I just accepted his answer for now and kept walking. The area we had just arrived at had a new mirror, I’m older now, but still young. A full curly beard covers my face, and long black hair runs around me. I still wear thick glasses and have some fat around me. Just above the mirror №. 2 displayed, and now the numbers displayed 2 0 2 4, this time through a small heart is displayed next to the numbers.

"Wonder what that’s supposed to mean."

"Life…love, things your kind finds meaning in." C responded.

"Do you not believe in that meaning?"

My question was spoken to deaf ears, he showed no emotion to the question, and he started off walking ahead.

This area was a broken bridge, connecting two halves of a city. A river infinitely far below us cut the city in half, and tall buildings that made the Tower of Babylon seem small were crammed together on both sides. It was raining, but it couldn’t cool my real body, though the sensation still ran over my skin. Rail tracks went over this bridge, and we walked along them, dodging holes in the ground that would have us dropdown. This area had an ambient soundtrack, something all too familiar and foreign.

"Why do you think this world is made the way it is?" I queried.

"You should know."

"How? I barely recall how we got here. Besides, I’d remember creating a beautiful world."

C only shifted and looked at me with a puzzling look and smirked, shaking his head. It left me feeling anxious. His look told me he knew something I didn’t.

Ahead of us, an escalator takes us up into an old office building. Once inside there is a singular desk, and behind it a stairwell. We make our way up, and it takes a while, to the point that I lose track of everything. We eventually made it to where the stairs end. We walked down a hallway till we hit a room with large windows, looking out to a large room. On all sides of this room are other buildings, other than the opposite of us, which is a glowing static screen. It's somehow raining out there.

"So, you don’t think this has some sort of meaning?" I asked as we looked out the windows.

"Maybe…but that’s not for you to know." He said, crossing his arms over his chest, clearly disgruntled, I wasn’t getting whatever he meant.

"Why not?" I said bluntly looking down at him

"Because it is humanly impossible."

"How so? How can it be?"

"If it wasn’t humanly impossible, I’d tell you…I liked you more when you were smaller and accepted my answers." He went on to speak in some Slavic language, I assume mocking my inability to grasp what he meant.

I went back to looking out the window, the reflection of my false body I’m now acutely aware of. I couldn’t help but smile and laugh. I don’t know why I found it funny. But it was. C just looked at me, his sour face sweetened a bit. Maybe I was starting to get it, maybe I was just going insane. We kept walking and I was trying to keep track of the world in my head. Through the turns of the hallways, we should’ve been intersecting ourselves, going back to rooms and hallways we’ve been through. The power of this world is that it doesn’t have to abide by normal rules I suppose. We got to a room with many intricate pipes going to an abstract sculpture. A rhythmic hum played on, and an open elevator greeted us, which we entered. We stood a little close for comfort and I was happy my rancid smell couldn’t fill this space. The elevator took us to the next area, a library.

We exited onto the first floor, we were greeted by a №. 3 and 2 0 4 5. Here an image was next to the numbers, it appeared to be a brain. There wasn’t a mirror here, but I felt older. My hand gently stroked my greying beard, and my glasses felt heavy. There were bookshelves everywhere, slightly taller than me and we walked amongst them. It's one of the few times I’ve been upset at the limitations of technology, I’ve always loved the smell of musty books and the feel of old books.

I got lost for a long time, looking at titles I couldn’t read, and browsing at my own leisure. However, my attention to the books was broken as I looked around. I couldn’t find C anywhere. Though I knew where he’d likely be. Towards where we’d entered there, I’d find the stairs going to the second floor. They were grandiose and wide. My footsteps echoed in the stairwell, bouncing off the granite floor and walls. When I got to the second floor, it was a gallery. It was a maze to walk through, but all images were interesting to look at. Though the art was different than last time, at least I think it was. It was all blurry, out of place, or nonsensical in nature. Some of them depicted brutalist architecture, the insides of buildings. They felt familiar, I couldn’t help but feel I had taken these photos, or painted them, or had I? Something was rising in my chest, fear. I started to run through the maze until I bumped into C.

"Fuck man, watch where you’re going. You could knock someone over." He said

"Hah…yeah," I said, catching my breath. "Wait…ha-ha, you’re funny." I said sarcastically.

C just stared at me weirdly for a few moments, trying to analyze me before he spoke "Yeah…why were you running?"

"I was just running to try and find you man…" My sentence trailed off towards oblivion as we stared at each other.

"You’re scared of it…aren’t you? The truth of it all." 

"No…just… drop it, man." I said

A long silent moment followed while I caught my breath, my lungs ached and filled up with less air than before.

"I’m not scared of the truth…but over the fact that I don’t understand it."

"You will, in due time. We’re close to the end, do you feel it?"  I couldn’t help but nod, a looming fear started to overtake me. Though the haze I’d felt started to diminish.

"Why does it all feel familiar? Are those my photos? I thought this was VR or something." C smirked "You’re starting to see. This world is your construct."

Before he could talk or try to continue this conversation I started off towards a nearby staircase, racing up for a while, and started to struggle. I was scared, I wanted to run from him. I felt as though I had been running upstairs, my lungs felt full of fire. Soon I got to a door which had a sign above it that was green with a little stick figure running to a door. 

Once I passed this sign it all felt familiar, it all felt real. It looked like the reception to a hospital, though squeezed into a hallway. Above the reception, №. 4 is displayed with a cross the four numbers now 2 0 6 7. The walls were painted pale green, and though I know I couldn’t have possibly smelt the smell, it smelt of cleaning solutions. There were cardboard boxes in this hallway, paperwork and such spilling out of it.

I walked forward some before turning back, his footsteps echoed up and down the hallway. The end of the hallway where I entered had transformed and now was a window overlooking the river and buildings. I backed away in terror, but then stumbled into a shoddy hospital bed. My breath was shallow, and my lungs ached for air. I was too tired to fight my way out of this deathbed.

"Want me to push you from here?" C asked as he approached.

"Why am I filled with dread? Why am I scared of what's to come? Why do I fear you?"

"You fear what you do not know." His accent changed, and I could understand him better now.

"I’m not in VR, am I?"

"You constructed this world, to try and understand, to try and find meaning."

"Will I?" 

C just chuckled lightly, "You are human, so it is hopeless." For a long time, we stayed there, while I contemplated what was next.

"Please…I want to see the rest of what I’ve made." I said softly, my voice starting to crack.

C would move to the head of the bed, behind my vision, and begin to push, the bed rattling as we went along. The world here felt unfinished, random almost. A bench curved along the wall, impossible for someone to sit on. A massive hole in the wall shows the guts of the building. Chairs, wheelchairs, and beds were strewn around. Posters on the walls I couldn’t decipher. On and on we went, through corridors until we pushed past a tight door into a new room. A pool was in the middle of the room, beyond it were two tables of sorts.

"What are those?" I weakly asked.

"Autopsy Tables." He replied bluntly 

"That will be my next bed?" I asked.

"Da." He said in a cold voice.

"Why show me this?" I simply responded, which was met with silence.

C would pull me back and we went into the corridor, moving along. I couldn’t help but shake the feeling he wanted me to see its meaning. But why? If he’s trying to show me my mortality, why does he act like it matters? Besides, he said I couldn’t possibly know the meaning anyways. It all felt absurd, like some cruel joke. 

In my thoughts, I missed a lot, only breaking out of it when a cold wind snapped me back. We were looking at a sphere, above and below were infinitely tall pyramids, their tips pointing to a sphere with a quarter missing. Swirling arms like that of a galaxy spread out as far as I could see, orbiting the sphere. The path was narrow, and it led to the sphere, beyond, darkness swallowed everything. I was able to get out of the bed with C’s help and we walked down the path. Once before the sphere I could hear the slow rhythmic beeping of a machine, it sounded like a heart monitor. Tears welled up and my vision blurred.

I walked over, we stood where the quarter of the sphere was missing. A small bed and heart monitor were all that this area held. C would let go and let me wander over to look down upon myself. I looked old, and frail, but a smile erupted across both my faces.

"So why did my mind make this world?" I asked, falling against my bed, looking at myself.

"To try and make sense of it all. To find meaning." He spoke.

"So, what happens next?" I said looking at him.

C would not respond, only to walk over and put his hand on my shoulder in a last act of comfort.

My lungs struggled before I felt them fail. The monitor started to make an ugly sound play and the world started to collapse around us.

"There is a purpose to life." He said, looking at me.

"Isn’t it absurd then…"